First date tips
Above all else, dating should be fun. To calm your nerves and prevent any awkwardness, it helps to stick to some first date ground rules.
Although we get wiser and more confident with age, dating is nerve-wracking no matter how old you are. For many, returning to the dating scene after a long hiatus is incredibly intimidating. Fortunately, there are currently more dating tips and opportunities available to over-50s singles than ever before.
Before you set out on a first date, research the ‘dos and don’ts’, and keep the following pointers in mind.
Grab a coffee
Meeting at a coffee shop, rather than a bar or restaurant, will allow you to chat in a casual, public place without any pressure to make it a drawn out three-hour event. If it quickly becomes clear that you don’t feel a connection, then you can rest assured that it’ll be over in less than an hour. If the coffee date goes well, you can plan to go for drinks or dinner for date number two.
Ask open-ended questions
For many of us, the worst thing that could happen on a first date is silence. We dread those long, brutal pauses in the conversation where time seems to stand still. If you do find yourself at a break in the discussion, just ask questions. People tend to enjoy talking about themselves, and your date is probably no different.
If possible, avoid ‘yes or no’ questions and stick to more open-ended icebreakers instead. For example, ask “What are you looking forward to most this Christmas?” instead of “Are you looking forward to Christmas?”.
Go easy on the compliments
It’s nice to hear nice things about yourself, but when the gushing comes from someone who’s practically a stranger, it can come off as too intense. There’s nothing wrong with a nice, casual comment like “that’s a lovely dress” or “what a fantastic wristwatch”, but saying something like “you’re so beautiful” or “I just love your eyes” may be too much too soon. This is a first date; focus on getting to know one another.
Keep it light and stay positive
You know what they say – don’t talk about religion or politics. This is particularly true on a first date. Instead, go for lighter topics like your kids, your favourite holiday destinations, recent films you’ve seen and what you like to do in your free time.
Also, no negativity! Sometimes we use complaining – about the weather, our jobs and the economy – as a crutch. But instead of leaning on these common grumbles, challenge yourself to add something more creative, thoughtful and positive to the conversation.
Of course, the best tip of all is to be yourself. When you do find someone that tickles your fancy, you want him or her to like you for you, not for anyone you’re pretending to be.
What are your first date tips?
Silversurfer's Assistant Editor
Latest posts by Silversurfer's Assistant Editor (see all)
Leave a Comment!
Community Terms & Conditions
These content standards apply to any and all material which you contribute to our site (contributions), and to any interactive services associated with it.
You must comply with the spirit of the following standards as well as the letter. The standards apply to each part of any contribution as well as to its whole.
be accurate (where they state facts); be genuinely held (where they state opinions); and comply with applicable law in the UK and in any country from which they are posted.
Contributions must not:
contain any material which is defamatory of any person; or contain any material which is obscene, offensive, hateful or inflammatory; or promote sexually explicit material; or promote violence; promote discrimination based on race, sex, religion, nationality, disability, sexual orientation or age; or infringe any copyright, database right or trade mark of any other person; or be likely to deceive any person; or be made in breach of any legal duty owed to a third party, such as a contractual duty or a duty of confidence; or promote any illegal activity; or be threatening, abuse or invade another’s privacy, or cause annoyance, inconvenience or needless anxiety; or be likely to harass, upset, embarrass, alarm or annoy any other person; or be used to impersonate any person, or to misrepresent your identity or affiliation with any person; or give the impression that they emanate from us, if this is not the case; or advocate, promote or assist any unlawful act such as (by way of example only) copyright infringement or computer misuse.
Nurturing a safe environment
Our Silversurfers community is designed to foster friendships, based on trust, honesty, integrity and loyalty and is underpinned by these values.
We don't tolerate swearing, and reserve the right to remove any posts which we feel may offend others... let's keep it friendly!