It’s all about a positive mental attitude

Marilyn McGee has been widowed twice but counts her blessings. ‘I’ve been so lucky to have had two happy marriages,’ she says and plans to bring that positive spirit with her to Wadswick Green.

She hopes to entertain and bake for the new friends she will make. ‘If it’s a wet day and I can’t get out for my regular walk, I bake lots of cakes and biscuits and take them round to the neighbours. I like being wanted and useful. I don’t want to do everything for my own pleasure.’

She will be near Fleur, the eldest of her two daughters. ‘She’s just separated and I’ll be able to help with the grandchildren as I’ll be just five minutes away by car.’ 

Fleur was the child Marilyn, now 80, thought she would never have. She had become engaged to Paul, a schoolmaster, within two weeks of meeting at a badminton club in 1958. ‘I’m a very impetuous person and my father made me promise to wait until the following year. So I booked the wedding for the first Saturday – January 3, 1959.

‘The dressmaking classes I had at convent school stood me in better stead than all the Latin and Geography lessons.  I made my own wedding dress for £5 – remarkable when I think of what my daughters’ gowns cost to buy.’

Marilyn, who had trained as a nurse, enjoyed her work running clinical trials for a research company but to her great sadness children didn’t come along. To her great surprise, after more than ten years of marriage, she discovered she was pregnant with Fleur and Lorna arrived 18 months later.

‘Then just four weeks after my youngest was born, Paul collapsed at school. He was diagnosed with a form of kidney cancer and was in and out of hospital for five years.’ Paul sadly died aged 42 in 1976.

‘My faith kept me going. Over the years there were men who were interested but I found it difficult. The girls rather resented anyone coming in and if they did like someone, I couldn’t get them out of the room.’

She met property finance director Terry, who attended her church, after dropping him a line to commiserate over the death of his wife. ‘Some months later he came for lunch and one of the girls said he had the hots for me – a revolting phrase. But he was the kindest man on earth and we married a year later.

‘We travelled all over the world and he used to say going away with me was a doddle.  I’d got used to carrying my own suitcase. In his first marriage he holidayed with his six children, two au pairs and wife in a wheelchair. He died in 2011 some years after being diagnosed with colon cancer but he kept his spirits up to the end. He had a lot to live for including nine grandchildren.

‘We had a similar sense of humour and both loved cricket. I really miss not having someone to turn to and say: “Oh, great shot!” I am looking forward to meeting new friends at Wadswick Green as well as walking in the beautiful countryside. I do pilates which has kept me supple. I’m very active and still clean my own car.’

Marilyn has bought new furniture for her two bed flat with its open plan living space perfect for dinner parties. Although a specially commissioned shelving unit will showcase photos of family, including the two husbands she has lost, Marilyn says: ‘This is a new life and a new beginning.’

The following two tabs change content below.
Hello ... I am the Creative Director and Website Editor for Silversurfers and manage all the social media too. I hope you find the features and articles we have shared with you of interest and relevance. Please feel free to comment below and share your thoughts with us ... I hope you enjoy Silversurfers and all that we offer ...

Leave a Comment!

Not a member?

Join the silversurfers community today! It's free, easy to do, and is packed full of features and amazing offers!

Join the community!
Click here if you have forgotten your password

Community Terms & Conditions

Content standards

These content standards apply to any and all material which you contribute to our site (contributions), and to any interactive services associated with it.

You must comply with the spirit of the following standards as well as the letter. The standards apply to each part of any contribution as well as to its whole.

Contributions must:

be accurate (where they state facts); be genuinely held (where they state opinions); and comply with applicable law in the UK and in any country from which they are posted.

Contributions must not:

contain any material which is defamatory of any person; or contain any material which is obscene, offensive, hateful or inflammatory; or promote sexually explicit material; or promote violence; promote discrimination based on race, sex, religion, nationality, disability, sexual orientation or age; or infringe any copyright, database right or trade mark of any other person; or be likely to deceive any person; or be made in breach of any legal duty owed to a third party, such as a contractual duty or a duty of confidence; or promote any illegal activity; or be threatening, abuse or invade another’s privacy, or cause annoyance, inconvenience or needless anxiety; or be likely to harass, upset, embarrass, alarm or annoy any other person; or be used to impersonate any person, or to misrepresent your identity or affiliation with any person; or give the impression that they emanate from us, if this is not the case; or advocate, promote or assist any unlawful act such as (by way of example only) copyright infringement or computer misuse.

Nurturing a safe environment

Our Silversurfers community is designed to foster friendships, based on trust, honesty, integrity and loyalty and is underpinned by these values.

We don't tolerate swearing, and reserve the right to remove any posts which we feel may offend others... let's keep it friendly!