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My Telephone Week

Do you get plagued by nuisance calls? This witty poem written by Claire Baldry diarises a typical week of unwanted callers … 

My Telephone Week

He called me on a Monday,
Said his name was Guy,
Told me of the refund
I could get for PPI

The phone rang twice on Tuesday,
The lady’s name was Dee,
She spoke of eco matters,
How my boiler would be free

On Wednesday I was worried
By an accident I’d had,
The insurance chap who phoned me,
Was convinced the wounds were bad

On Thursday my computer
Had a virus, warned the man,
If I’d just pay an online fee,
They’d do a special scan

Friday’s call brought surveys
Detailed finance questionnaires,
Do they really need my passwords
And the details of my shares?

Saturday at 6 am,
The voice said not to fret,
A special deal was waiting
That would clear me of my debt

Sunday…..it’s so quiet,
I am sitting with a book,
Sunday is my day of rest,
The phone is off the hook

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Claire is a retired Headteacher who lives on the East Sussex coast. Claire is an established speaker, performance poet and writer. She has a strong following on You Tube and has been listed in the top 100 Poetry Rivals National Competition. Claire has published five booklets of poetry which have sold hundreds of copies. 'Simply Bexhill' was published in early June 2014, and 'Simply Christmas' in November 2014. Her third publication is a series of narrative poems entitled 'The De La Warr Date'. She more recently published 'Seaside and Sailaway', which includes a section of poems about holidays on cruise ships, and Simply Modern Life. Claire has published two full-length novels, the first called 'Different Genes'. and more recently 'My Daughter's Wedding'. Both are romantic stories about love in later life, combined with a gripping mystery. The books can be purchased through bookshops, Amazon or borrowed from any local library. Links can be found at ww.w.clairebaldry.com .Claire and her husband were awarded the SE Diabetes UK Inspire Award in 2017 for innovative ways of fundraising.

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