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Dinabob4's bio
Hi, I'm from the South East, I like to communicate and enjoy meeting new people. I'm 52 and I've had various jobs and I'm working from home in the corona virus crisis and maybe ongoing now! I enjoy travel in the UK, (It's easier to drive on a familiar side of the road), reading, walking and eating out (when we can, safely again). I am an animal lover too. -
Dinabob4's latest comments
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31st Mar 2023Dinabob4 commented on:
Help needed re clocks going backHi Caro, the clocks usually go back at the end of October and then we are plunged into further darkness in the winter! I wonder if they will stop this process at some point. At least it feels lighter in the evenings now! and we can look forward to when it will stop raining!ViewDate:
31st Mar 2023Dinabob4 commented on:
What is everyone watching at the moment - [DELETED_MEMBER]Hi Ian I will update when I have watched some of the Bay! I might start it this weekend. What else are you watching? I just use the forums sections on here to chat to others. I am located in the borders of Bucks and Beds, which is sort of considered South East but almost on it's way to the midlands you might say compared to more southerly parts. Sometimes considered home counties. Whereabouts are you? Kind regards.ViewDate:
30th Mar 2023Dinabob4 commented on:
What is everyone watching at the moment - [DELETED_MEMBER]I have taped The Bay. Watched the previous series. Hopefully it is worth watching then if you recommend it. I do not come on here much now, I did in the pandemic and lockdowns, but got a prompt today.ViewDate:
28th Feb 2021Dinabob4 commented on:
Lockdown and the affect it has on usHi Jacpal I do not think you are being unreasonable. I have always thought that the older generation should be valued more. I've always gravitated to people who are older and have had so much life experience and usually have good stories to tell. I also think that as you say, when you get older you have not got as many years left and it is right you should be able to make the most of it in what ever way suits you best. Older people should not be left alone and lonely. I am not old yet but I can empathise with how it must feel. I have been young and I think you generally do not have as much to worry about, and you have your whole life ahead of you to feel optimistic about. I do I'm afraid have more empathy with older adults, but of course care about younger folk too if they are in need. The older generation have been through a lot too, such as the war times in some cases. Let's hope the young learn from the pandemic too, about what is important in life. It might build their character some more.ViewDate:
28th Feb 2021Dinabob4 commented on:
Hello from Canada!Hi Pattybakes I know of Bristol and the River Avon, because I am in the UK. Others on this post are in Canada though. It seems amazing that this navigator could undertake such a journey of exploration. Thanks for sharing. Have a good day.ViewDate:
28th Feb 2021Dinabob4 commented on:
Hello from Canada!Hi Mike A bit of a belated happy new year back to you! It's been a bit hectic since early January in different ways. I've not logged on here. Hopefully I will do a longer reply sometime soon. Hope 2021 brings you some laughter, joy and new experiences. Our vaccine roll out in the UK is going well and they are planning for all adults to be done by end July 2021. That could be the start of something closer to a normal life. Best wishes DinaViewDate:
22nd Dec 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Chats with friendsHello back to you Barb. Yes we are all coping with covid times the best we can. Hope you have as good a Christmas as you can.ViewDate:
22nd Dec 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Just to say helloHi Geoval, Yes, you are right this is a nice site. I think it is a little difficult to navigate for some because many that put posts up do not reply again to the replies that many people given them. That doesn't matter of course. It is just what I have noticed. I think here and there, people communicate with someone or other. We do get on with our lives and forget to log on for a while too! First forum I every joined when we were in lockdown this year! Good luck.ViewDate:
22nd Dec 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
I’m new to this.Hi Willow2, Thanks for sharing your story on this site. You have had a difficult year. How are you doing now? Restrictions are of course, still a bit part of our lives. DinaViewDate:
22nd Dec 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Hello from Canada!Hi there Mike, The days are flying by and it is almost Christmas. We are still in the thralls of the epidemic which is in a third wave and now they have identified a new strain, causing problems as they believe it spreads faster, but not that it causes more illness apparently. The south east of England has now moved into a new Tier numbered -4 where non-essential shops have closed and mixing over Christmas is limited only to bubbles and your own household. The vaccine is going to take time to be rolled out in reality but about 600,000 have been done. The plan at the moment - includes the elderly first and health and care workers and then down to over 50’s at the youngest end, as well as those who are clinically vulnerable adults younger than 50. Problem of course is hospitals becoming overwhelmed. To keep as positive as possible, I try to think of things I can do to have some quality of life and make the most of things. Sometimes it is being hopeful that things will be better soon.. say next year.. or in a few months etc… probably false optimism! If you do something towards it then that is productive and having some ideas is good. We are always told that thinking positively is beneficial for our health and getting out in the daylight here and there and trying to have some fun, mixing with people where you can, even if on the phone or video call. Do something you are interested in! They also say that those with a spiritual belief i.e. they feel part of something larger than themselves is good, and helps with purpose and psychological wellbeing. I generally always try to find solutions but you can still have days when you are just down in the dumps a bit, and it’s hard to pull yourself into a better mood. It may be that sometimes you just wake up the next day and your outlook is better. I enjoy meeting different people. I have been out today for a walk with a new friend I made this year in a local online group. No, I don’t have any missing closeness with anyone. I feel like I sort of see life in a different way and all types of love are good including the ‘unromantic’ kind which can be more calm and stable and has a lot of value to me. I am not keen on the ups and downs that come with intense connections. I like partners to be a good friend and companion and a sense of humour helps. I think laughing is very important to wellbeing. It releases endorphins probably. When you are feeling down, advice is to put something funny on to watch, like a good comedy. Or maybe put some music on that gets you swaying or dancing around. I love watching the old 70’s British comedies. The other day I watched for the first time in ages: ‘some mother’s do ‘ave ‘em’, with Michael Crawford. It was so ridiculous it really had me laughing out loud – lol! He was on the driving lesson from hell! And ended up in the sea! In general, it is good to have a partner if is worth it for you both, otherwise I think being single is better than being in the wrong relationship. I think there are people who feel that is what they must do, as soon as possible, to settle down with someone. Many also drop friends and other parts of their life. It may be because children come into the picture and they are very busy. A partner should enrich your life I think and you have something to offer each other, ideally. That’s my take anyway! Thanks for the safety advice. I agree and wouldn’t wear earbuds walking around. As you say you wouldn’t hear what was going on around you. It doesn’t bode well with road safety either. I do look around, if I am on my own. I look behind to know whose around. Especially now with covid anyway! as I want to keep my distance too! Lol. If I had to I would walk into a house and up the garden if I felt it was needed. Oh the personal panic alarms. Good point! I have one that I should get out. Someone bought if for me when I was doing a different job but I do not do that job now. Good idea to get the alarm out though. I hope you can think of somethings to look forward to and to plan to do, with your girlfriend when things improve. How do you feel about the vaccine? Are you going to have it when offered? Do you feel better when you have had a productive day? and ticked a few things off your list! I find if I have been a bit productive the rest of the day is better! It is good to have a few things planned in some days and other days you then can have no plans which I quite like! So you can chill and take the day as you wish. If you like writing, do you like putting pen to paper in any other way? Keeping a bit of a diary or journal perhaps. I like to be able to check back on what date certain things happened! Have a safe and merry Christmas. Happy new year, and lets hope 2021 is a better one! DinaViewDate:
28th Nov 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Hello from Canada!Hiya Mike Sorry a late reply. Time seems to go quickly at the moment. It may be because work is busier. Each day just blends into the next! Yes we are all well into a second wave and it is being managed in many different ways. Like Canada, here in the UK we have many Tiers, 1, 2 and 3, and we are in a 4 week lockdown which is about to come to an end on 2nd December when we move into Tiers again. There is not much difference between them and people get confused. In this lockdown education is still open and it wasn’t before and many types of work are still going on that cannot be done at home. It hasn’t been as strict. Overall hospitality is being hit the hardest. We have something called ‘furlough’ in the UK, so the government pays workers such as hospitality 80% of their wages when unable to work due to government restrictions. It stops and starts and will not go on for ever. The amount of government expenditure and borrowing has been astronomical. People need to be careful at Christmas as there is a worry for hospitals coping in Jan and Feb. The government has given 5 days of relaxation of rules but everyone is saying they will not see people indoors as it is only one year out of your life and it is too risky, particularly for the older adults. Caring can be tough and you need breaks for yourself to recharge. I have carried out the role for parents primarily. I wouldn’t say you are destined for health problems as a carer but the body and mind are complex and any type of psychological stress can affect the body, but hopefully whatever it is it can recover and heal in time. They say having a positive outlook helps, but that can be hard at times. Sorry to hear you cannot go for walks or to the beach. I don’t know the exact circumstances but is there not a way that can be done, even with a wheelchair? Maybe the bike riding or camping you could do yourself or with a friend (once in a while). That could be some ‘you time’ for a break. I do not think you can give up everything you enjoy as you need to stay well. Are you able to encourage your girlfriend to pursue or spend some time doing hobbies or things she is interested in. They say a little time apart is beneficial for a relationship and then you come back together and have something else to discuss. I understand and agree that people should be able to somehow share openly and honestly, to who-ever that may be, and usually someone not in your close circle. It is healthy to release what you want to say or feel. By doing that you can often find your own solutions or a way to work with what you have. Sometimes different perspectives can help. I can only say there must be many couples who are together a long time and get to a point where one of them will before the other, no longer be able, or have the physical need. It can be any age. I am not a man, but I know people can go without. Many people are single. Maybe if you are single the expectation is not there and that is easier than if in a couple when it is difficult. As I’ve got older I personally value good companionship more and mind to mind connections but certainly agree a good hug is good for you to show love as are many other ways. Maybe the stress can be released in other ways too, such as exercise. You need to do some things you enjoy. A cycle instead. That is all I can say. I assess vocational courses and sometimes it can (or did before the pandemic) involve observing in the workplace to evidence skills. I’ve moved to online courses mostly now. You can do training sessions online with individuals or groups with videocall. Subjects vary from social care to leadership and management and business administration. I like the variety and as I loved learning myself it suits me. I do see what you mean about the perception of the security guard role. Some may misinterpret what is involved or hope it is an easy life unless something kicks off! I realise, there is much more involved and it sounds interesting. As you say you need to be aware of legislations, first aid and CPR for a start. I remember doing a control and restraint course once! Trouble is I thought, would I remember these techniques if every in the situation. I follow safe practices though that courses teach you including one called: violence and aggression. You would not park your car in an unlit quiet place for example and return alone. I always do check the back seat if it Is dark! I hope next year you can get a break when the better weather is here. Time management! Yes, umm. I am a bit of a last minutes sometimes, but I can be organised too! What do you get up to when not at work? Do you go for walks yourself? Did you get on with your siblings? I assume you do not live near them now. You said your sweet tooth has caused problems before. Was it at the dentist? I hope that has now settled down. Stay safe. DinaViewDate:
27th Oct 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
I’m new to this.Hi Eebby Welcome to the site, it is a good step to make. I am sorry to hear of your loss. I understand it is a really difficult time and at such an early stage. It cannot be underestimated at all. I would say you do get stronger as time passes and you think of your loved one and all the good times. You build your life little by little and feel them with you in your heart as you find your way into a new chapter of life. It is harder to focus in the early stages. You could try writing a little list of things that make you feel a little better for a while. It could be anything: such as: a walk in the park, a relaxing bubble bath, watching a comedy, reading a few chapters of a book (any subject you could take), a heartwarming film or maybe a chat to a friend or family member. Look at the list when feeling down. Maybe journalling might help let your feelings out a bit. I like to write down everyday a few thoughts and about what has happened. If you are in the UK you could ask for bereavement support from charities such as Cruse, if it helps to talk. Take care DinaViewDate:
27th Oct 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Hello everyone!Hi MsC Welcome to the site. I hope you can have a double celebration next year! Historically pandemics do end so I am hopeful. The internet has been a lifeline for work and play this year. I am in England myself. Stay safe. DinaViewDate:
27th Oct 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Are you a big tea drinker?I love the first cup of tea in the morning. Yorkshire tea is my favourite.ViewDate:
24th Oct 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Hello from Canada!Hi there Mike, I hope you are well. I hope I have mentioned all things in the last message here. We have 3 Tiers now in England and my area is 1 the lowest. Infections seem to be rising everywhere but more so in some areas and they are in Tier 3 which is pretty much a local lockdown. Wales and Ireland are using short term circuit breakers which are like full lockdowns for 2 to 3 weeks. The government still recommend you work from home if you can. I prefer to practice caution as I feel I need to rationalise that I have not taken unnecessary risks if that makes sense. Rather than being scared of getting the virus, (I don’t want to get it of course, even a chest infection is not pleasant and this virus can be unpredictable) I need to feel my decisions are not risky as I would have to live with taking a silly risk that ends up giving me the virus or even if I gave it to someone else and that is a responsibility. You have to have a standard that you follow. Infections are rising again and we need to get through the winter. I hope there will be a time when I can be more relaxed about it, next year Sorry to hear about your injuries. The body can let us down as the years pass and it gets much wear, it seems. I see the conflict both you and your girlfriend have, and hope you can find a balance. I think you should be able to maintain your health to some degree to be able to maintain your abilities, also so you can be there for her and to support her and your wellbeing is important. Both of you are important. Maybe walks in the park are something you can both attend. I do empathise with people who have these challenges to deal with in life such as having a disability that affects mobility and needing to be reliant on others (if that is the case). Being out in the fresh air and having some movement must be good for her too, with whatever aids she uses (if she does). This can work out and you can all learn and grow from the challenges you face. I do understand the feeling you describe of having a conflict with a perceived feeling of no solution. Sometimes it is just a frame of mind and it is the way you look at a situation. You can sort of feel trapped but the feeling passes. I would always be looking at all sorts of options where everyone could still have their needs met within the situation. It is not always possible to find ideal options. The way you feel about it can change from one week to the next. It is all about the way we perceive things. Sometimes you can feel quite happy, as of course you would if you have love for the person. I wouldn’t say I have a lot of will power but I have some because I think of the result of not taking the action and it can be worse. I try to do as much as is necessary as I know getting out for a walk or doing a session on the cross trainer will make me feel better mentally and physically. I feel it is more like a maintenance or prevention strategy. What you say about online ordering I can relate to as I had that view to start with. Worried about fraud etc. and privacy. I have now let practicality and convenience take over. I have never had a problem and used online secure methods for years. I feel the sites I use are reputable and secure and I always use only cards that give fraud protection. If there was any fraud you would be compensated and the money would be reimbursed. I know of a couple of people who have been unfortunate and they are reimbursed by the major credit card company. There are lots of additional levels of security even with banking. You have a device you put a code in and that gives another code etc. It has become so convenient and many people do it. With Covid some stores do not want to take cash as it involves much handling and we even use contactless where possible, on small amounts. (I never used this method before until covid! But now I have.) This is all to minimise handling. Since Covid I have moved to online ordering and click and collect as it minimises the risk walking around the store. I didn’t at first, I walked around with my mask but now I feel safer not going to the supermarket. It is so convenient, I can even order online by 11pm in the evening to collect the next day! And free of charge as long as you spend over £40. It is quite straightforward. I am not worried about paying this large supplier. You could even have deliveries, but I am quite happy to pull up in the car park and collect my groceries. Deliveries are harder to get and I will leave those available for those who really need them. I did have to weigh this up as to what is the most safe method as I used to go in the store and pick up my own groceries and use a device to scan (Which avoids the need for a check out assistant touching your shopping), but realise not going in the store is the safest. I do even wipe over the goods packaging or leave some for a couple of days if they are just boxes etc that do not need to go in the fridge or freezer. (Bit over the top to some maybe) We all do what makes us feel comfortable I suppose. My work is sort of an essential service I train either one to one or small groups of adults and it can be done with video call. Some of the courses can involve reading up on a subject and then answering written questions through an online platform. I agree totally about tarot cards and think most people could read them in a very generic way that could fit and it is quite concerning about how many people claim to have psychic gifts as it is totally unregulated as of course it would be. I do not advocate ‘divination’ of any kind. I do not believe in reading sun sign predictions in the daily newspaper either. It was in fact an interest in psychology that drew me to learning about character analysis within astrology as it was a way of trying to understand why people have certain traits such as introversion and extroversion and I found within astrology all the ways we live our life and think and feel can be accounted for. Two of my siblings also read about it and we shared our views. I started to see some accuracies and then continued with it. Within the signs, planets, aspects and houses most characteristics can be accounted for. You seem to make sense of it, which I like to do. No-one is just a sun-sign and no two are the same, because we have moon signs and mercury signs and all sorts as well as positive and negative aspects between planets in the chart. We are all unique of course. I do think also think we are influenced by genetic factors and social environments and our life experiences as well as our astrological blueprint which gives us some tendencies. We can work with those strengths and weaknesses. I do think we have a soul as well. You say faith in something has to be earned and I agree. Our own experiences of whether there is truth in something is what I go by. You could compare this to these personality tests that exist that psychologists or employers use in trying to understand people. The results are gained from filling in a questionnaire. Such as: ‘’The Myers–Briggs Type Indicator is an introspective self-report questionnaire indicating differing psychological preferences in how people perceive the world and make decisions. The test attempts to assign four categories: introversion or extraversion, sensing or intuition, thinking or feeling, judging or perceiving.’’ You end up with a four letter code. Many people are into such things and there are online groups. Sounds like you enjoy moderation with food, a mixture of treats and some healthy foods too. You are right that working from home means motivation can be tricky and you have to have a bit of a routine. I am part time which is something. On one hand I am glad I can work from home to feel safe, and on the other I know it is not so good for our mental wellbeing. In reply about retirement I hope to still be able to do whatever I get some sense of purpose from. I hope to still have my brain! I am not sure I want to totally give up all work, maybe do a few hours of something as I please on a freelance basis. It will be nice to go out sightseeing and just generally enjoying life and seeing the people who mean the most to me I suppose. I hope Covid is over by then!! I did think writing could be an option but I am not sure. What would you like to be doing in your retirement years? How would you like to picture it? Stay safe. Dina.ViewDate:
4th Oct 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Hello from Canada!Hi there Mike, I understand you have been busy as your students are back. My work continues and I generally feel a bit busier so sorry it’s a been a bit longer too, since a reply. These seems to be more things in the diary of late, which I suppose is a good thing, even if it isn’t face to face contact always. It might be video call or telephone calls sometimes. Time seems to have picked up in speed again. It is just a perception of course. The busier you are, time seems to go quicker. In the earlier months of covid it felt like it slowed down. Do you worry about picking up the virus? or are you trying to be level headed about it and take all the necessary precautions. It is a low risk I suppose. Perhaps you recognise the benefits of living a life as close to normal as possible? Do you sometimes get your groceries delivered or do you prefer to go into the supermarket? We have a smart shop where you can pick up your own goods and scan them as you go around the supermarket so you do not need to go through the checkout with a worker. I use click and collect mostly lately. I am in a bit of a dilemma. I recognise the benefits of seeing colleagues yet still try to maintain all work from home as long as I can. Infections are high again even though fatalities are quite low, perhaps because it is mainly younger people getting infected. Our prime minister has announced a return to the message of: ‘’if we can work from home, we should’’ for the next 6 months, yet my employers still seem to want everyone to return to coming into the building (even though we all carry out different roles). I will be sticking to my principles on this, because it is a public health message and I would rather get through the winter being as careful as possible. Yes, it is a shame that there is a bit of a commitment with having a pet, but one day, again I will! Thank you for your comments. You say about ‘comfort over restraint’ being more of a struggle. Do I feel that? I suppose, yes. I feel I live in a bit of balance and moderation though. I do not overeat but have what I enjoy. I actually like healthy food plus a few treats sometimes. I could go to the cupboard and eat 2 slabs of chocolate and put it back and maybe have a bit another day. I do not go the gym anymore it has dwindled off over recent years due to practicalities and now covid, but I make sure I get walks and do a bit of exercise in other ways. I have a cross trainer I use sometimes. Whatever I do I seem to stay a reasonably healthy weight and it may be hereditary. Of course it is not just about weight and I do not exercise for that reason, it is for your overall health (physically and mentally) and to try and maintain mobility and strength and stamina especially as we get older. Because I do not do a physical job I probably am a bit more sedentary than I should be and have to make sure I get up and do things! Even if it is housework (vacuuming the whole house is quite energetic) or to go for a walk. I do not remember once bitten of Jim Carrey’s. I looked it up and it was before he became as popular and as funny I think! I do not feel passionate about any subject at the moment. I am still curious though about many subjects as long as they are in the best interests of people. I am open minded to a spiritual life and that we are all part of something. I like reading books on mind, body and spirit. As I have read and experimented with astrology and seen such evidence of accuracy in birth charts I do believe in it having an influence. What type of food do you enjoy? Is there anything you are passionate about? Are you doing any new courses or writing? Stay safe, Dina.ViewDate:
23rd Sep 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Looking for friends to chat withHi Suesan, Just saw your post. I too will be working from home for the next 6 months I expect and I have been since the lockdown in March. You do miss the office chit chat and face to face contact. I wasn't in the office full time, as I am part time and not always office based but it was nice to catch up with people. The contact on Teams or Zoom is not quite the same is it? Lucky you for living near the coast and you have a dog to keep you active. I agree it is good to get out for walks and fresh air. I do too, I am in the south east of the UK. What sort of things did you chat about in the office? I miss going out to eat and having a coffee whilst visiting a place of interest or a browse around the shops. (Now though, since the virus I feel we spent too much money on commodities and I think I will be less likely to keep buying new things again, unless a need). Skegness and Chapel St. Leonards come to mind! Been to your coastline a few times.ViewDate:
17th Sep 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
AlohaHello Judi2, welcome to the site. I log on every so often. What do you like to chat about? I hope this site is linking up many people around the globe. It can be a little difficult to navigate and maybe that is why people do not see replies. Once you get the hang of it though. This virus has changed our lives for such a long time now. It is so unpredictable. I thought when we first went into lockdown in the UK it would be for 3 months and then that would be it. No, not at all. We are finding new normals. So many people are affected in different ways. Regards DinaViewDate:
17th Sep 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Hello, new here.Welcome Linda. I am in South East of England. Have a good day.ViewDate:
17th Sep 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Sick Sinus Mode DysfunctionBless you. Sorry to hear this. Sometimes a diagnosis can make us feel anxious because it is the unknown. But! Sometimes it is helpful as you can then manage whatever is out of balance in the body. You know what is happening and can do something to help yourself. It does sound like relaxation is the very thing. It is so good for you in many ways. I do not know much about this diagnosis but when looking it up it is to do with irregular heart rates, but maybe in your case it is not too bad. If you have not been given medication and just to live healthily that may help. It is good to lose weight and be relaxed for your health in general. Are you worried because you do not know enough about it? I think some Drs. do not explain things in the best way and leave people feeling a bit worried. Many things are relaxing and if you are anxious in general it will be good for you to find what works for you. Some gentle exercise such as walking, if you can. (Will help you with weight too). Other ideas are: Meditation and deep breathing. Breathe in through the nose and hold for a few seconds then slowly release. Chatting to others on the phone. - Social contact will help if you feel low and anxious. Watching a feel good movie. A relaxing bath. Doing some gardening and losing sense of time and being in the moment. Stroking a pet. What do you find helps you relax, any of the above? If you are feeling low, reach out and talk to someone, even if just to work out what will help you. A new interest might be a good idea? Would that help you? Look after yourself. DinaViewDate:
9th Sep 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Hello - looking for like minded friends to chat withHi Rhyll Welcome to the site. I am also female and close in age to you. You can get involved in conversations on here. I joined a couple of months ago. Your username reminds me of Wales as there is a place called Rhyl. Are you in the UK? What topics do you like to talk about? I hope you manage to get out a bit and explore your new town a little. Kind regards,ViewDate:
9th Sep 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
I'm a newbieHi there, I noticed you have posted a question. It may be best to send it to the editor of the site as you have replied to a post from 4 years ago so you may not get a reply. I would say It depends on your settings in your profile as to whether you get an email notification of a reply. I find even then it can vary so it may be worth a check by logging on every so often. You may want to start a post of your own by clicking on ' add a new post of your own'. You have some interesting hobbies so I hope you can find like-minded others on this site and manage to join in conversations. Take careViewDate:
3rd Sep 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Hello from Canada!Hi Mike (St), Thank you for your message. It was interesting reading. Lake Ontario sounds quite pleasant, looking out at the water and as you say no salt or sharks! I can see you have the imagination or vocabulary to write, or both, or is it the ability to reflect on experiences and bring them to life too. One of many books I bought was ‘the creative writing handbook’. I haven’t read it all. I believe it includes exercises to do. (Like many books I buy, I dip in them!) I wasn’t sure if fiction was for me at the time, although they say you can think of an experience that is true and then adapt it or create a different ending to it. That’s one approach anyway. I totally agree that cats and dogs too give unconditional love. Sorry to hear about your parents too, and of your divorce. There are many endings we have to go through in life and where we have to try to move on and build again. With bereavement of parents we can only build around that loss. I suppose your relationship with them can play a part. It is good advice to have a cat or pet, thanks and strangely others have suggested the same. I will at some point. At the moment I am concerned a pet might hold me back for going away sometimes when this pandemic has eased up. I will definitely get one, one day, maybe even 2! It is also the sadness of losing them you would have to deal with as you point out. (I tell myself -at least with animals they do not have to suffer for long and can be given a release from it). Some people decide to get another pet to help the loss. I am open minded to some subjects included under naturopathy I suppose. Natural remedies I prefer and I try to avoid pharmacological treatments where-ever possible or anything invasive, but of course they have their place and you have to get medical advice. Sometimes these remedies can be complimentary. I avoid popping pills but if you are in pain then sometimes you have to, I would use sparingly and just suffer a bit, with hope the issue will be resolved. I believe treatment or healing needs to be holistic and think there is much evidence to show that the mind affects the body. If you are unhappy, troubled or harbouring resentment it can be shown in the body in all sorts of ways (is a belief). In that way, relaxation therapies of any kind including exercise are beneficial or finding ways of releasing emotions in various ways. There is scientific evidence of the benefits of relaxation such as meditation in that certain feel good hormones are released etc. The heart rate slows down and the blood pressure is lowered etc. They say stroking a pet can have this effect don’t they! Yes I agree about supplements where needed. You need to know anything you take such as herbs, supplements or pills are reasonably safe and about side effects or interactions. Massage is OK for many but made me feel nauseas once, so not for me. I prefer some meditation sometimes as that can be relaxing. So you have been in the same job for 15 years. That’s good and you can always get work. Sounds like your work has always been fairly physically active which is good in some ways but tiring too! When I’ve stayed in the same profession for a long time I may still change employers after a few years or perhaps to a slightly different role. Maybe you have. I do get itchy feet with work. I was with one employer for 12 years and then we were all made redundant due to closure of the network when the work was going online! We were given redundancy money so that was a bonus and then got a new similar role. At the moment my work is linked to training and is mostly done on line or remotely at the moment which is of course possible. Yes a movie can lift the spirits sometimes. I think TV is relaxing in small doses and depending on what you watch. What brings out my faith in humanity? All I can think of at the moment is seeing genuine acts of kindness. People giving up their time for others. Seeing people get the help they need or things work out for people. Being really interested in a new subject like the students you mention is great. I have been there before a few times but it is sometimes hard to sustain. Sometimes cynicism can set in. I wish I could get that new enthusiasm again about a subject. I am just thinking what actors came from Canada, and Jim Carrey comes to mind. I believe he was born in a suburb of Toronto, Ontario. He is a favourite of mine and like his earlier films of Liar liar and Yes Man. I can re-watch and still laugh. He is so expressive and zany. He is an impressionist though of course. Going back I like Tom Hanks too and some of Denzel Washington’s films. Do you have any favourite actors? Do you have any pets at present? You probably really are out there in the land of the living with your job. (Where I have worked once it was security who had to try and get workers out of the building at closing time! Lol. So they could secure the building, which I think can be a bit tiresome for them when people do not want to leave, i.e. the workaholics.) Best wishes.ViewDate:
2nd Sep 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
FrienshipsHi Susi Kins, I was notified of your message. I am OK thanks. I feel a bit busier this week as well, just like you. So you have workmen in your area, that can cause a bit of upheaval! I hope it is for a good reason! I work from home some days of the week and trying to keep in contact with various people, friends and family. I get out for walks and have done some gardening. I see you worry about your children, I think that is natural whatever age they are and of course at this current time. I expect your daughter wears good PPE as a Doctor. Many people are trying to be positive about the future that I speak to, and we have to take tentative steps. I suppose the risk is low but we still worry. Hope the rest of your week goes well!ViewDate:
30th Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Scared and LonelyHi BTP, Glad to hear from your response that you are close with your younger daughter. You have a lovely relationship and bond there and a new grand-daughter on the way. That is exciting. It is a shame when families fall out and it can be so hurtful. As you say mothers who have not long given birth are hormonal and quite sensitive. I only know as I have heard similar stories from others. Offence can possibly be taken quite easily at things said as if they are criticisms. You have a tentative truce now, so that is something and hopefully time will heal and it will be talked about. I think people can feel lonely even with family around them. Maybe if they do not feel valued because not much time is spent together. Some people cannot show their love as easily. Are you affected by covid in that you feel afraid to meet up with people at all? My life is affected because I am reluctant to meet unless in a garden or outside. The government have frightened us into this when trying to make us stay home and it will take time to come out of it. Take careViewDate:
26th Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
FrienshipsHi Susi kins, I am sorry to hear what you have gone through. It seems long journeys are a problem on public transport where no access to amenities. It is unbelievable how unkind people can be. You need some short journeys where you know where facilities will be and maybe plan some trips that way if you can. Covid has been a bit of problem for availability of that, but I believe facilities are open in places you just have to make sure you carry hand gel etc, maybe plastic throwaway gloves. and handwipes. Keep your chin up. I hope your voluntary work and swimming open up soon. We cannot live forever like this can we.ViewDate:
26th Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Looking for like-minded members to chat withThanks, you have to look for the positive. Zoom is great but as time goes on you realise it does not fully compensate for real face to face contact. It is stated that it is harder to process non-verbal cues which means more concentration is needed which can be tiring over time. It is also stated that the delay of 1.2 secs can make people look less friendly or focused. I have noticed this delay. You say something and the person looks blank, then people talk over each other!ViewDate:
24th Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Scared and LonelyHello BTP, I've read your message. I can sense your sadness. I think covid raises all sorts of issues and although you say it isn't the cause of your loneliness, you say you want to change things a bit but life is limiting at the moment, so we are back to the effects of covid again. It has also affected you going to the choir too. You have made me think about how it must feel when people have children and then they grow up and you might see them less. They will have their own lives and of course see you sometimes. That must be hard if you feel they do not see you enough. I think I could sense my mother may have felt like that about some of her children (at least not me as I was very close to mum and dad). But it still must be better to have the children and their love than not at all do you think? You have the grandchildren too. I understand you would want some life of your own on the side too. If you could do more what would you like to do? The choir is one area. You say you have masked your loneliness in the past. I think on-line should be an area we can make use of at this time when social lives are affected. I am happy to chat and log in regularly, if you want to message back on here. Chatting to others can help. DinaViewDate:
24th Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Just joined so I'm introducing myself.Hi Allan, Good to hear from you. I do not get notifications about all messages so it doesn't matter what time they are sent. I should see them when logged on. I am generally an 'owl' rather than a 'lark'! Oh you know a little about what's happening at Towyn then. I have a few photos from there. It was somewhere to have a base and then you can drive around and see the sites of many nearby attractions. The orme yes is very high up from what I remember. We used to go as a big family, some of who we have sadly lost over the years and things change. I used to always watch the news at the beginning of this pandemic but now I realise it was news overload as it is all doom and gloom. I know watch it now and then. Of course you like to be up to date with what is happening but you can have too much of it! Do you watch the news? I like documentaries or anything about real life, particularly things that are uplifting! Do you get out for a walk sometimes? I find they are good for you if you can. Have a good evening. DinaViewDate:
23rd Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Loss of a soul mateThank you for taking the time to do this reply to those who responded to you. I hope as you said at the end of the message, that it helped even though emotional for you to write down what has happened . You want to try and move on and I hope you can. Life can be so shocking and yet again you have had difficult news. I hope you can take comfort that your dog is now at peace. Cherish your memories of your old friend. Sorry to hear this sad news. It was not meant to be and hopefully you will meet someone new. I cannot comment on dating sites, as you say they sound like too much emphasis is made on appearance. How can you tell unless you meet people face to face and become friends first. Looking at a photo can be difficult and pretty cold. I am sure for many they are worth trying but it may take time to find someone genuine but you can and some people do. I am sure there are some women who would take a photo on 'face value' and of course 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder'anyway as they say! Best wishes on your new journey.ViewDate:
23rd Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
FrienshipsHi there, Yes the rain we have had has done the garden some good especially my grass. The weeds are a pain, yes. I was looking out for products for the grass that are friendly to birds and the environment but I have not found any yet, I decided on. I may just leave the grass this year. I do just cut it and try to keep it tidy. So your neighbours are going away a lot even this year. Good for them as you say. I thought people were staying more at home with the virus but everyone is different. I am glad to hear you have your husband and you are not alone. Sorry to hear you have not been away for so long and about the health difficulties you have. I have helped someone before who did have the difficulty you describe. There are things you can wear, especially which should help you feel more confident and are very protective. Aldi do some which are very good value. People can be so cruel and that is not fair, it shouldn't stop you going away. I hope your activities resume soon. Do you enjoy reading ? Can you manage to do gardening as well.ViewDate:
23rd Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Just joined so I'm introducing myself.Hi Allan Hope you have had a good day. Yes it has been a bit cloudy today (Sunday). In answer to your question to find this site you could just search the internet 'silversurfers.com' and then you can log in. It takes a bit of getting used to. Unfortunately I find you sometimes get notified you have had replies and other times you do not so you otherwise just check when you log on here and there. I use a laptop, I like the larger display, but some prefer to use a smartphone or it is just convenient. Oh you are close to Llandudno and North Wales. Lucky you. I have been to most places along that coast including colwyn way, conway (the smallest house!), Rhyl. The isle of Anglesey. Right down to Pwllheli. I remember driving up a very steep hill at the Orme in Llandudno and the person in front of me decided to stop! It was not a great experience. I remember some chalets we stayed at in Towyn. I think they have been knocked down now. I have been inland too. So many places to mention. You have to look at a map sometimes to refresh your memory. Sounds like the area of france -Brittany was very relaxing. It is good to look back on the memories of your good holidays. Do you have many photos of your memories? I love looking at my old photos. Regards DinaViewDate:
22nd Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
CyclingHi Granky, how are you getting on with your jigsaw puzzles? and you hobbies. Glad to hear you are well. Regards, DinaViewDate:
22nd Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
FrienshipsGood to hear back from you, yes I think you are right, this situation is getting to most people in different ways. The concern is for those that are not computer literate as you say. I hope you can see them perhaps outside while the weather is nice. It is good that you speak to your son every Sunday and you have a nice garden. I am glad for mine too. I've just been out for a walk with some family members. Are you able to get out for little walks, it does do you good if you can. I hope you can find ways to do things you enjoy with your health issue. I am starting to think I have to take a few more safe risks as it doesn't do anyone any good staying home too much. We can keep a distance outside. Even in the Autumn/winter we can wrap up I suppose. Take careViewDate:
22nd Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Just joined so I'm introducing myself.Hi Allan, You've been all over the UK, that's nice to hear. I think I have been to most parts too, yes. Scotland is lovely. I haven't been in recent years and not as high up as Fort William. I've been to Edinburgh, and the surrounding area. Also Kirkaldy, Fife and Perth etc. Probably the east coast too such as Arbroath. I agree Cornwall and Devon are lovely places to go and have been a few times. It is quite a long way but worth it. I have also had many holidays in South Wales and North Wales and most resorts on the south coast of England and the south east. We have a few holidays in Great Yarmouth in younger years and Norfolk as it is not too far to travel to get to a coast. I have been to France but just to Paris and Eurodisney, mostly. I have been to many other European holidays but I do not think I am keen to fly again and may just stick to the UK when we can do normal things. I hope you can go on holiday again next year. It may be possible if you go self-catering as that is quite risk-free. Was you hoping to go to France again if it was not for the virus. I hope you can see friends or family, if you have any near you, in outside places at the moment. I hope this virus peters out by next year! Dina.ViewDate:
22nd Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Just joined so I'm introducing myself.Hi Kim4, Welcome to the site and hi. I hope you get to see your 8 grandchildren! I don't have any children but I've just been out for a walk in the woods with sibling, nephew and great-nephew! Hope you are managing with life changes. It can take time. You like surfing the net. I am not sure what we would do without it this year! I've always loved tapping on a keyboard. Regards DinaViewDate:
22nd Aug 2020ViewDate:
21st Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
Just joined so I'm introducing myself.Hi Allan, Yes the years fly by and this one is turning out to be a loss unfortunately due to the situation. I miss the same things as you! it sounds like, the eating out with friends etc. and even just visiting people. We will appreciate it when it feels more safe to do so. Yes let's hope September is nice so I can still get to see some relatives in their gardens (where it is safer than inside). Your winds sound worse, I think the north is affected more at the moment. Thank you for being sorry about my dad. We all get to an age where we have losses and have to live with them, sadly. Things to talk about! Well, what about holidays in the UK? Do you have any favourites or regulars or was you always busy working? Regards DinaViewDate:
21st Aug 2020Dinabob4 commented on:
All new to thisHi Catherine M1 i am sorry to hear you have been widowed just 3 months ago? How are you getting on. 3 months is such early days. You might be a bit stronger in 6 -12 months but of course everyone grieves differently and it is gradual and there is no right or wrong. I am sure you could try to build a life in time just to give you some hope, it takes time to find some purpose again but you can. Do you find that working full time helps give you something to focus on? or is it a struggle. I am glad you have your children. Coming home to the house will get easier in time.ViewDate:
21st Aug 2020 -
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