Jan Millward takes a light hearted look at the ageing process from a female perspective!
It seems that I’m now an old woman,
with rickety hips and worn knees.
I never thought that I would be,
I had fluttered through life on a breeze.
I never quite saw old age coming,
I was far too busy to see.
I scuttled past others in wheelchairs,
I never thought that would be me.
but it stalked me like an old lover,
it chewed into my bones like a dog.
it broke off great chunks of my memory,
and my sunshine was turned into fog.
My knickers are now built for comfort,
where once I chose satin or lace,
my wrinkles are spreading like cobwebs,
and have covered each inch of my face.
my boobs have taken a nose dive,
my bra now has six hooks and eyes.
it grips into my chest like a monster,
like a straitjacket in disguise.
I used to wear heels and high fashion,
my skirts would turn many a head,
now all my clothes have elastic
to fit in the middle age spread.
I used to take so much for granted,
I never thought I would grow old.
I’m now wrapped up in fleece and old blankets,
because I always seem to be cold.
Old age is creeping up quietly,
I now have false teeth and grey hair.
and my lovely shiny old sports car,
is replaced with a tartan wheelchair.
And slowly you start to realise
when a shop keeper calls you “My dear”,
that now it’s your turn to be Granny
you are permanently stuck in low gear.
but old age does have an advantage,
you can always get seats on a bus.
and pensioner prices in café’s,
so sit back and enjoy all the fuss!
janm would love your feedback, please leave your comments below:
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