View comments by: Most Recent - first / last | Most Popular - first / last | Replies - hide / show

Dating know how advice please

I have never asked a lady out for a date. Partly for fear of rejection and partly to save them the embarrassment of saying "no". Too late now of course but it would be interesting to know how other gentlemen cope with this dilemma.


Created By on 01/02/2016

Not a member?

You need to be a member to interact with Silversurfers. Joining is free and simple to do. Click the button below to join today!

lunastar
5th Nov 2021 05:02:11
0
Thanks for voting!
I have not been on a dating site either orchard lane. Mostly because I think that men my age want a 40'year old., rather have someone that they can get on with as friends, know there has to be an attraction to develop into a relationship, but it can't be instantly there.,You could say anything and be anyone and there are some crazy people. Been widowed a very long time now and I've missed the boat so to speak. Even my family said join a site but never did.. I gave been asked out a few times but knew they were not for me, it's hot yo ve mutual, I justvsaidvinwasntnreadybfirbtgst but thank younger adding. They soon found condone that did feel it, so orchard lane, perhaps it's time to give it a go,
Bria
5th Jan 2017 00:56:37
1
Thanks for voting!
I am single and looking to date , I am not interested in Dating sites ..I would prefer to meet someone by chance in a social situation , my problem is that all my friends have partners and I wouldn't expect them to leave their husbands at home to enjoy a night out with me, can anyone give me some advice.
trb264
29th May 2016 16:44:37
1
Thanks for voting!
I have had the same problem since I was rejected at the age of 16 by a young girl I thought I was madly in love with at the time. I have feared rejection ever since.

Luckily, through my late teens and twenties, I found that girls were attracted to me and they would ask me out. I think playing guitar in a band helped. I married the girl of my dreams when I was 29. I had seen her walking down the road a few months before and fell instantly in love. She happened to know a friend of mine and we met at a party. I couldn't ask her out as rejection would have been devastating. But luckily, she felt the same about me, asked around, got my phone number, called and asked me out. I still feel the same about her now. I look at her and wonder why she picked me.

Unfortunately, recently we have been having problems and she has gone. I miss her dearly and hope that we can one day sort out our problems.

But have faith. One day the right person will come along.
baileyb
20th Mar 2016 15:14:20
0
Thanks for voting!
You should not feel embarrassed to ask a lady out. What's the worst that can happen. If your on your own and she says no,,your still on your own. If she says yes, happy days. You can only win. Go on orchard give it a go and get your best suit ready just in case
lyn44
13th Mar 2016 00:33:43
1
Thanks for voting!
why would you not ask a lady for a date?
mandy gere
9th Feb 2016 20:21:51
0
Thanks for voting!
Orchard lane- y is it to late? If you would like a partner to share your life give it a go??!
Lollypup
2nd Feb 2016 02:06:19 (Last activity: 3rd Feb 2016 11:06:54)
1
Thanks for voting!
You are your own worst critic....the fact that you are on a public forum says alot about your willingness to give it a go as they say....being a single senior, over 60 female is much more difficult than being a single male over 60.....jump in you have nothing to loose at this stage of life.
Response from orchardlane Original Poster made on 2nd Feb 2016 10:23:51
Thank you for your response. It is much appreciated.
I suppose in the age group you mention there are more women, or so we are told, and is therefore not easy being a single senior lady and on that basis it should not be difficult for a chap. I have been trying to "give it a go" for some time but when it comes to the crunch it becomes the Woody Allen scenario. You often hear about people having "exes" in the plural as if it were normal to just jump in and out of relationships almost by the dozen. Not being able to find even one is both pathetic and frustrating. It makes you feel as if you are somehow not part of society.
Nil desperandum. Something will turn up.
Response from LanceFogg made on 2nd Feb 2016 11:40:43
Why is it so much more difficult being a single female over 60 than it is being a single male over 60? I hear reasons given along the lines of "it's a lot easier for a man to go into a pub by himself". But is that really true or just an excuse not to do that? I don't like the wind and rain but I don't use that as an excuse not to go out if I really want to. There are probably just as many, if not more, organisations for women to make friends as there are for men.
Response from orchardlane Original Poster made on 3rd Feb 2016 11:06:54
Nothing other than it being just a matter of numbers. I have belonged to singles clubs and been outnumbered by at least ten to one.
LanceFogg
1st Feb 2016 12:37:30 (Last activity: 2nd Feb 2016 10:25:22)
2
Thanks for voting!
Be bold. Be yourself
I always remember years ago someone saying to me - it was nothing to do with dating - "well, no-one else going to market you, you have to do it yourself". Since then I've never had any problem with communicating with either sex.
If they don't want to know they will be honest with you as you are with them - male or female.
I think most women don't mind a man showing interest, if it's genuine and honest.
Response from orchardlane Original Poster made on 2nd Feb 2016 10:25:22
Thanks for your reply and it is appreciated.

Community Terms & Conditions

Content standards

These content standards apply to any and all material which you contribute to our site (contributions), and to any interactive services associated with it.

You must comply with the spirit of the following standards as well as the letter. The standards apply to each part of any contribution as well as to its whole.

Contributions must:

be accurate (where they state facts); be genuinely held (where they state opinions); and comply with applicable law in the UK and in any country from which they are posted.

Contributions must not:

contain any material which is defamatory of any person; or contain any material which is obscene, offensive, hateful or inflammatory; or promote sexually explicit material; or promote violence; promote discrimination based on race, sex, religion, nationality, disability, sexual orientation or age; or infringe any copyright, database right or trade mark of any other person; or be likely to deceive any person; or be made in breach of any legal duty owed to a third party, such as a contractual duty or a duty of confidence; or promote any illegal activity; or be threatening, abuse or invade another’s privacy, or cause annoyance, inconvenience or needless anxiety; or be likely to harass, upset, embarrass, alarm or annoy any other person; or be used to impersonate any person, or to misrepresent your identity or affiliation with any person; or give the impression that they emanate from us, if this is not the case; or advocate, promote or assist any unlawful act such as (by way of example only) copyright infringement or computer misuse.

Nurturing a safe environment

Our Silversurfers community is designed to foster friendships, based on trust, honesty, integrity and loyalty and is underpinned by these values.

We don't tolerate swearing, and reserve the right to remove any posts which we feel may offend others... let's keep it friendly!