Funerals (To attend or not to attend)?
Watch this postDo you, if rules allow, attend the funeral of a family member who you haven’t seen for almost 30years? A cousin has died, I have never met any of her family and I doubt anyone at the service would recognise me. Do I attend? Thanks in advance
Log in to comment
You need to be logged in to interact with Silversurfers. Please use the button below if you already have an account.
LoginNot a member?
You need to be a member to interact with Silversurfers. Joining is free and simple to do. Click the button below to join today!
JoinCommunity Terms & Conditions
Content standards
These content standards apply to any and all material which you contribute to our site (contributions), and to any interactive services associated with it.
You must comply with the spirit of the following standards as well as the letter. The standards apply to each part of any contribution as well as to its whole.
Contributions must:
be accurate (where they state facts); be genuinely held (where they state opinions); and comply with applicable law in the UK and in any country from which they are posted.
Contributions must not:
contain any material which is defamatory of any person; or contain any material which is obscene, offensive, hateful or inflammatory; or promote sexually explicit material; or promote violence; promote discrimination based on race, sex, religion, nationality, disability, sexual orientation or age; or infringe any copyright, database right or trade mark of any other person; or be likely to deceive any person; or be made in breach of any legal duty owed to a third party, such as a contractual duty or a duty of confidence; or promote any illegal activity; or be threatening, abuse or invade another’s privacy, or cause annoyance, inconvenience or needless anxiety; or be likely to harass, upset, embarrass, alarm or annoy any other person; or be used to impersonate any person, or to misrepresent your identity or affiliation with any person; or give the impression that they emanate from us, if this is not the case; or advocate, promote or assist any unlawful act such as (by way of example only) copyright infringement or computer misuse.
Nurturing a safe environment
Our Silversurfers community is designed to foster friendships, based on trust, honesty, integrity and loyalty and is underpinned by these values.
We don't tolerate swearing, and reserve the right to remove any posts which we feel may offend others... let's keep it friendly!
My thoughts about attending and the questions I asked myself:
if I don’t attend, will I regret that chance to say goodbye? Regret not seeing family that might remember me, that I may reconnect with, that may want to keep in touch with me? And would I welcome that kinship if it was offered?
Or can I just let it go? Think of my cousin on the day, be a bit sad, but let that sadness go.
Well, actually typing my thoughts has helped me. I hope it may be if some use to you too.
Whatever you decide, be at peace with it.
Thanks for your comments and thoughts.
RJB
I would write to the family offering condolences and taking the opportunity to keep in touch in the future if they wish to do so.
You are right, I won’t be attending.
My sister, who was closer to my cousin and her family, will be attending.
Thanks for your thoughts.
You are right, I won’t be attending.
My sister, who was closer to my cousin and her family, will be attending.
Thanks for your thoughts.