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Kinda lost - is it too late to start again at 65?

I’m married to a 78 YO man and am not happy. This is my second marriage and I married him because I was on the rebound and lonely.


Now 19 years later I’m so unhappy. Is it too late to start over again?


I’m 65 and not happy.


Created By on 16/04/2021

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ralfwechs
7th May 2021 02:05:52 (Last activity: 7th May 2021 22:22:19)
0
Thanks for voting!
I'd like to think it is not too late. 67 here and have been single for a while now.
Response from Sally - Silversurfer's Editor made on 7th May 2021 07:47:14
Hi ralfwechs,

Welcome and many thanks for your first comment in our Forum.

If you already know your way around, then we will leave you to it.

If you are looking for some lively discussions, head on over to the Forum homepage to see what's trending right now and feel free to join in the discussions, with all our friendly members, perhaps ask a question or even start your own post.

Response from ralfwechs made on 7th May 2021 22:22:19 > @Sally - Silversurfer's Editor
Thanks, Sally. I think I'm getting a hang of it now.
carriex
16th Apr 2021 09:44:37
0
Thanks for voting!
Theoretically it's not too late to start over, but in practice it's tough to find a man one's own age (I am similar in age to you) because men in their sixties look for women a good decade or more younger etc. Not fair, but that's the way it is....maybe it will change for the next generation....

Also, I dont' think lockdown/post-lockdown is a good time for drastic changes, as the whole last year has been so, so ghastly. To do something drastic with one's life when things are not 'normal' is dangerous.

Can you write down for yourself a list of 'Why I am unhappy?'....a 'What's wrong with me and my husband?, and 'Bad things about him/good things about him.'

Does he know you are unhappy?

SO many men are hopeless at 'reading' women. We tend to be far more attuned to moods than they are, by and large, and he may have no idea you are unhappy.

What is it that is actually making you unhappy?

Many men find it hard to show affection, which is SO essential to a marriage (far more than sex I would argue!!!!!!), but so often it is wives who have to show affection, and be demonstrative. Just sitting on a sofa together, holding hands, or in physical contact, can be enough. it's the feeling of being wanted and valued that each partner in a marriage needs above all.

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