Weddings
Watch this postYesterday our granddaughter came to visit us, not a normal thing, but. She came to tell us she was going to get married, nice news, and she chatted about the wedding and what she was looking forward to. To cut a long story short she then asked for a contribution of £2,000 toward the cost of the wedding, I went ballistic, I tried to explain you married for love -- not to show off. Her response was it was a girls big day and everyone should help ,,,,,,, now her aunt with the big wedding had been married twice, her other aunt with a big wedding had been married twice, her mother who had had big weddings had been married four times, her grandmother and I who got married in register office nearly 55 years ago were still together. She left crying that we did not love her enough. Maybe one day she might understand that we loved more than she knew. Am I being unreasonable?
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They, and their parents, are spending a vast amount of money on this wedding - not my thing, but there you go.
However, our granddaughter does visit and keep in touch with us, and giving money for a wedding is about what you can afford, and what you feel appropriate, I suppose.
I've been married twice, and both times were very simple weddings, as I didn't want a church or meringue dress do, so I don't think size of the wedding has any implications for the longevity of the marriage, or I'd still be married to husband number one!
It used to be just the bride's parents, then both the bride's and groom's parents that paid for a wedding. These days many couples marry later, in their late twenties or thirties, and have careers and financial independence. So they pay for their own wedding, based on what they can afford. This was the case with two of my sons. They asked for a contribution from friends and family to help pay for a lovely honeymoon, but the amount was left to the donor. And I was very,very, happy to help with this, to the maximum I could.
If either of them had come to me and said "I want X thousand pounds for my wedding" I would have come back with a saying from their childhood - " I want doesn't get!"
If I were you, I would be very tempted to ask the granddaughter " what makes you think I have £2k that I don't need?"