Glastonbury

Jan Millward takes a very lighthearted look at the joys of going to the Glastonbury Festival …

Glastonbury

I could be an attendant
and be in charge of loos,
cleaning up at Glastonbury
with toilets full of poos.

It really makes me shudder,
it truly must be grim,
to tackle all those cubicles
filled right up to the brim.

And I am very grateful
I thank my lucky stars,
that I’m not stuck in traffic
with miles and miles of cars.

I can live without the music,
I must be getting old.
I couldn’t cope with camping,
I’d be muddy and quite cold.

Adele I find depressing,
she just keeps droning on
about her old boyfriends,
she never can move on

Coldplay they’ll be singing
about their paradise,
with thousands in their wellies
it’s not my idea of nice.

I hope they all enjoy it
but it’s my idea of hell,
I’m not too good with people
the noises and the smell.

So all you folk out camping
in fields all over Pylle,
having wet wipe washes
and feeling rather ill.

I hope you do enjoy it,
you can say that you were there
but I am more than happy
sat at home in my own chair.

Jan Millward©