You can’t use that

You can’t use that

Grandchildren’s school shoes
I offered to buy
My pants were pulled down
And I’ll tell you why.

I had an e-mail
With 30% off
That’s a good bargain
we go off to the shop.

Feet were measured
Chosen the shoes
Go to the till
Nothing to lose.

You can’t use this e-mail
It’s only online
Ok, fare enough.
Do you wish to decline?

No, I have a voucher
For £10.00 off
You can’t use that
You’ve not spent enough.

Put in some insoles
To make up the price
Two pairs of shoes
That’s two insoles twice.

I’m sorry to tell you
This vouchers expired
Are you feeling OK madam?
You look rather tired.

I’ll just take the shoes
With a 5p bag
Do you want polish?
No, I didn’t lose my rag.

Well would you believe it
What came from the till
£10.00 off
From your next bill!

Written by Pat Noon