image

Have you encountered casual ageism?

Ageism is stereotyping and discriminating against individuals or groups on the basis of their age.

Britain has one of the worst records in Europe on age discrimination, with nearly two out of five people claiming to have been shown a lack of respect because of how old they are.

It can impact on someone’s confidence, job prospects, financial situation and quality of life. It can be present in the way that older people are represented in the media, which can have a wider impact on attitudes towards age.

Have you been in a situation where you have been discriminated against due to your age? You may be fully aware that you have been subject to ageism, but sometimes it’s not so obvious.

  • Losing a job because of your age.
  • Being refused interest-free credit, a new credit card, car insurance or travel insurance because of your age.
  • Receiving a lower quality of service in a shop or restaurant
  • Being refused a referral from a doctor to a consultant because you are ‘too old’.
  • Being refused membership to a club or trade association because of your age.

What are your views?  Have you been a victim of ageism? Do you feel like you are becoming invisible? Do we live in a society obsessed with youth? Have you embraced the second half of your life with open arms? Are you only as young as you feel?

Have you encountered casual ageism?

169 people have already voted, what's your opinion? Yes No

What are your views?

We'd love to hear your comments

Not a member?

You need to be a member to interact with Silversurfers. Joining is free and simple to do. Click the button below to join today!

Click here if you have forgotten your password
Sparkle45
25th Aug 2017
1
Thanks for voting!
I encounter aging on dating sites all the time ... am honest so I put my real age 72 and I find I get umpteen views but nothing more as I suspect they think I am past it !

Am on our sister site and been viewed 42 times have messaged 5 males and had no replies ....

.... IF i had put 67 I would have had a better result.I know because of the age range listed on profiles .
janetcarrington
18th Aug 2017
2
Thanks for voting!
Yes sometimes people and particularly family, do not really listen to me when we are discussing various topics. I seem to be the invisible member of the family and sometimes they talk quietly to themselves. I came from an era when talking was a normal thing. I seem to be included though when my contribution is desired for the takeaways etc.
SueC62
10th Aug 2017
0
Thanks for voting!
I haven't noticed ageism, casual or otherwise, unless you count the young man who having given me a quick glance and decided I was of no interest to him, put on a sprint to get to the last seat on the train before me.

At work, I most definitely haven't suffered ageism. On the contrary, no one seems to believe me when I say I will be retiring by December 2019. They just laugh it off.

I agree with comments about keeping young, both inwardly and outwardly. We can't help some of the physical ailments that befall us but we can work round them. I'm gutted that I can no longer wear the killer heels that I'm known for, so I've adapted my 'look' to compensate. Sometimes I think I'm younger than my son but then perhaps now being child free, whilst he is saddled with a teenager, makes the difference.

Age has given me the freedom to do what I want without worrying what others think - and I quite like being seen as a bit mad. My friend and I are going to a Steampunk weekend next year, for the second time, and will be spending the winter making our outfits. And when we go on holiday in a few weeks we are taking tiaras and flowery headbands to wear in the evening, just like the young 'uns.

And, whilst I have my likes and dislikes, I embrace and accept anything new - music, clothing. I don't particularly like these funny drop crotch pants my grandson wears but then back in the 60s my mother refused point blank to let me wear white tights or paint false eyelashes under my eyes and I still can't understand why not.....
KathleenK8
8th Aug 2017
2
Thanks for voting!
Yes it seems that when you get to your sixties you suddenly become a different person in other people's eyes. You get asked if you can manage to pack your shopping or they assume that you aren't capable of doing things anymore, or they say do you remember this or that. Not everyone is incapable of making decisions just because you look a little older then you did makes you feel you are past your sell by date.
LinH2
8th Aug 2017
0
Thanks for voting!
I worked for the NHS for over 40 years. Once I reached the age of about 55, my views were no longer wanted and at meetings when the round the table comments were taken I was invisible - jumped from person on my left to the one on my right!! Was to start with very upsetting. Now some of those people are getting to the age of invisibility!!!
I am also fed up with being blamed for Brexit!! I voted stay as did all the friends of similar age i.e. over 60! In fact the younger people seem to have voted leave, along with those who were swayed by the immigration input which in fact was irrelevant to being in or out of Europe!!
jeanmark
8th Aug 2017
0
Thanks for voting!
My experience was obviously different, I worked in the NHS for 47 years and never once experienced ageism in any form. At meetings my opinion was always sought on those issues I was experienced in and I was asked to work with outside agencies, such as the police. This went on until I retired at the age of 63.

Like you I am fed up with being blamed for Brexit and everything else but I just smile and say 'Your time will come'!!
ElizabethW7
7th Aug 2017
1
Thanks for voting!
Santander and Lloyds both refused my 75 year old husband an extension on our mortgage despite our business still making money. The ombudsman ruled that banks and insurance companies can discriminate on the grounds of age. I believe they have now relaxed this rule. Now 78, husband is still working and playing tennis in the county leagues. Quite funny sometimes when he gets patronised by a young player who then finds his serve returned with interest. Travel insurance is calculated on age rather than medical profile which, I think is completely unjust and instutionalised laziness.
woodworm
7th Aug 2017
0
Thanks for voting!
I am 57 - over the years I have worked, mainly part-time, whilst bringing up children and caring for aged relatives. I have also worked for my husband. At present, I help my husband with his work, and hold down a 2 day part-time job. I now need to find full-time employment, as my husband has a progressive disease which will eventually mean he cannot work at all. Therefore I want to find a job where I can support both of us without having to turn to the state for help. Is anyone interested in me? NO! You don't have to state your age anymore, but they get round this by requiring the dates of when and where you worked. Not rocket science when someone's working life started in the late 70's. I have applied for jobs that go from my 'level' down to menial, no luck. Hmm? Wonder why? ................
jstagg
7th Aug 2017
0
Thanks for voting!
I had to take compulsory retirement on my 65th birthday - I tried appealing even wrote to my MP but no luck I was upset that just because of a date on a piece of paper I had to leave the job I loved Even more upset this year that there are now people older than I was still there I was very lucky that I did find some work and though they had the same 65 retirment policy I was the only applicant - been there 8 years now!!!
Glovers1505
7th Aug 2017
0
Thanks for voting!
Fed up of the press and some politicians blaming brexit on my generation some of us have brains and are very unselfish unlike many of the younger generation who are rotally self obsessed
jeanmark
7th Aug 2017
1
Thanks for voting!
Surely, Glovers1505, that statement is ageist which is the very thing the debate is about. I'm not convinced that being self-obsessed is only present in the younger generation. I have met a number of older people who believe their age gives them an automatic 'right' to respect.
spaniel54
7th Aug 2017
1
Thanks for voting!
I am applying for Jobs and I applied for a job I did 10 years ago, within days I had an Email advising me that I was not 'the right fit' for the job !! Knowing the person involved I know that this was because I am classed as too old as He is employing younger Polish girls these days !!
woodworm
7th Aug 2017
1
Thanks for voting!
Know the feeling Spaniel54 - really is not good. I was turned down for one, after being told that I was perfect for the job, had answered all the questions correctly and my command of the English language was excellent (gee, thanks!), because 'I had not told them on my application letter why I wanted to work for the Headmaster & Headmistresses Association'. Um, because I want a job?
spaniel54
7th Aug 2017
2
Thanks for voting!
Indeed Woodworm, they can be very sneaky these days, they are not supposed to ask your age but they do ask what year you did your exams !!
woodworm
7th Aug 2017
1
Thanks for voting!
Exactly! And to make matters worse, the jobs that you apply for, the rate of pay is less than I was making 25 years ago! No justice.
SharonC45
7th Aug 2017
2
Thanks for voting!
I've often been told 'why do you like that or do they You're too old." Or "you need to calm down and take it easy at your age". Mainly by my peers or 20 somethings.
At 56 I've been away travelling solo 4 times so far this year, once with a friend made when travelling solo last year. I've just come back from street art festival, have met up with friend made in Twitter in Barcelona, danced in clubs til dawn and been to jazz club solo. Off to drive Transfarg highway in Romania with Aussie friend made travelling. Life is short age is a number. Live it to the full -while I can carry my backpack I will
anubis
7th Aug 2017
2
Thanks for voting!
I don`t know if its ageism more attitude towards me that I find annoying, things like when I went to pick up a hire car while my car was in for repair being told to be careful because the VW Golf was a big car mine was a 2 litre Turbo estate he was so condescending. Being called sweetheart in shops I hate that and treated like a cretin in computer shops.
I may have grey hair and need a walking stick and look like a little old lady that doesn`t give people the right to treat me like a child.
jeanmark
7th Aug 2017
1
Thanks for voting!
I think we have all been there anubis, me, I take advantage of people who believe I am 'simple' because of my age plus with the added 'disadvantage' of being female. They usually learn from their 'mistake'!
NorfolkBroad
7th Aug 2017
0
Thanks for voting!
Funnily enough mine was because I was young. I married at 16 and had my family of three children by the time I was 21. People, and in particular professionals, assumed I didn't know how to be either a wife or a mother at so tender an age and would ignore what I said and be patronising. Fortunately I was stubborn! I knew I knew what I wanted to do and what was the right thing - regardless of their opinions - and just did it. Those 3 children turned out to be independent, self-sufficient, ready-for-the-real-world adults!
Irene88
6th Aug 2017
1
Thanks for voting!
We are all discriminated against because of our age just by the sheer fact that governments, councils and multinationals just expect us to use the internet to deal with things or find information. It is apalling.
ginntonic
4th Aug 2017
4
Thanks for voting!
Casual ageism can also happen to younger people. I have seen many older people show little regard or respect to people younger then them. I have noticed this a lot in restaurants and shops all over the country. It makes me wonder if these older people were always rude to others or aged that way.
jeanmark
7th Aug 2017
2
Thanks for voting!
I agree with you ginntaonic, some years ago I was waiting in a queue at a bus stop. When the bus arrived an 'old' lady pushed herself forward to get on the bust first. I politely pointed out that there was a queue (the bus was empty), she turned to me and said she didn't have to wait as she was a pensioner. At this point I made the comment that old age wasn't an excuse for bad manners and was she aware she was younger than me!
Yodama
3rd Aug 2017
2
Thanks for voting!
Yes I have.

Movies for £3, with free coffee and biscuits,
Bus passes
Pensioner special meals
Pensioner special entrance to many places
TV licence
Travel
Energy
Chemists
Shopping
Eating out and entertainment
Silvercard discounts

Disgraceful, I demand they treat me like a young person.
Lionel
3rd Aug 2017
1
Thanks for voting!
May I have your TV licence discount please?
Yodama
4th Aug 2017
1
Thanks for voting!
Free one all for yourself in the pipeline Lionel. You just have to live long enough to get it.
ACEE
2nd Aug 2017
4
Thanks for voting!
Age is just a number and there is nothing that you can do about it. On the other hand OLD AGE is a state of mind and there is a great deal you can do about it- keep physically active as you can and MOST IMPORTANTLY keep mentally active, programes such as this are usefull in tha regard.Don't be afraid to set yourself a daily challengs [mine for tomorrow is to improve my spelling !!!] and typing, to say nothing of my grammer
jeanmark
7th Aug 2017
0
Thanks for voting!
I agree age is just a number ACEE, but however active you are people tend to see the wrinkles and grey hair!!
Roof Top Crow
27th Jul 2017
4
Thanks for voting!
Ageism is stereotyping and discriminating against individuals or groups on the basis of their age.

I am an occasional contributor to these pages and inevitably I read the comments from other Silver Surfers. I regularly read comments on this site that discriminate against individuals and groups in society because they are young or just younger than most of us Silver Surfer contributors.

It is unacceptable to discriminate against people what ever their age.
Lionel
28th Jul 2017
2
Thanks for voting!
Rooftop, that's the perfect New Age description of society. All inclusive, completely homogenous, without opinions or any perspective. Dumbed down by Soma. You should read, or perhaps re-read Orwell's 1984. It's the road map for State control of the population.

There has always been discrimination, Rooftop, and always will be. I most certainly do not approve of it, but it is a fact of life which no amount of legislation will ever eradicate. One cannot successfully legislate against human nature. That's Blair's mistake. Until the final phases of 1984 kick in, which is on the horizon, human nature will prevail, and human nature is tribal. We are infested with Shibboleths. As each generation of Shibboleths is accommodated and surpassed the next lot arise.

We're faced with a Labour Party which is publicly anti-Semitic! Oh, that's been with us for three thousand years, so nothing new. As a Jew that bothers me a lot. I have been threatened with cut throat razors, been beaten in the street; I had a car damaged and house windows broken. I won't go on.

Human nature is tribal. It will ever be thus in spite of attempts at multi-culturalism and racial integration. A few years ago I got well bloodied in Germany.

Discrimination is here to stay. We must live with it. To return to the subject of this thread, both my wife and I have been subjected to small amounts of age discrimination. That's life; get on with it. Life isn't fair, it isn't just but it's the life we've got.
Roof Top Crow
29th Jul 2017
2
Thanks for voting!
You describe me as new age. I do not dispute that description because it represents my belief that we should all try to make society better.

If we take the view that society cannot be changed because it has always been that way then nothing would ever get better.

With the views you are taking negative values such as religious persecution, slavery, and the prosecution of gay and lesbian individuals would still be with us.
Lionel
29th Jul 2017
1
Thanks for voting!
Roof Top, you know I have an abiding respect for you as a person. But your comment above is well wide of the mark.

I did not describe you as New Age. How could I? We've never met. I said that of your comment. A New Age pipe dream that is doomed to failure because it takes no account of human nature.

Neither did I say I approved of discrimination in any form; no, I said the contrary, that my wife and I have been subjected to some very nasty discriminatory activity.

Human nature is tribal. We're here speaking of supremacies. It has never changed and never will. Attempts at a Utopia have failed miserably, because each one needs an alteration in human nature to succeed. You cite slavery, for example. Was not this supposedly eradicated from the British Empire 150 and more years ago? Yet today we have a junior in the Westminster bubble in charge of human trafficking and slavery. So what changed?

You cite religious persecution. Oh, I could write at length on that, Roof Top, and much from personal experience. Your next citation is gay and lesbian prosecution.

Please allow me to assure you, my views are not negative, no, just realistic. Human nature is not changed by legislation. Come the day, soon, ATMs and supermarkets are required by Westminster to shut their doors, water supplies cut off and electricity shut off, we will all become savages again.

Civilisation is but a veneer, a very thin veneer that prevails whilst it suits people. When that veneer cracks we are, as said, savages.

Human nature has not, and does not, change.
JohnHerb
27th Jul 2017
2
Thanks for voting!
As an old man I feel a bit like wallpaper a lot of the time. I may as well be plain wallpaper but that is what happens when you are an old, ugly, bald male. I don't get attention or service like a young attractive person would do but that is life and I have got used to it.
anf1408
27th Jul 2017
3
Thanks for voting!
As a mature student I have regularly encountered ageism. However, it is rarely from my fellow students. Instead it often occurs when I am entitled to student discount when attending events. In spite of having all the relevant id to establish my student status I am subjected to a series of questions as to how somebody of my age can possibly be a student. On some occasions I have even been told I don't qualify for student rates as they don't apply to older people. I console myself with the thought that if these people are so keen to categorize what a person can or can't do based upon age then their lives are going to become increasingly duller as they get older.
Ginjohn76
26th Jul 2017
2
Thanks for voting!
I worked on a very busy Hospital ward doing 12 hour shifts along side some lovely young member of the team. But just a couple used age against me but not in a funny friendly way. They were smokers and needed their fix. One shift a younger HCA said
" You oldies don't exercise " so I shrugged my shoulder in disgust and nearly fainted then went off work for a new left shoulder.
Swam today 1/2 mile with my grand-daughter and back at work tomorrow. All be it at a different job. Have to keep going until 66 so need to be fit. So much for the young. I've always worked along side them without a problem and love to pass on my experience if I can .
ElainePeony
26th Jul 2017
10
Thanks for voting!
This is amusing...I went into a large retail warehouse type shop wearing sunglasses...it was very sunny outside, I asked a young man where I could find ...whatever...he grasped me firmly by the elbow and steered me at a brisk pace to exactly what I needed! Marvellous service, I recommend thoroughly everyone who is wrinkly use the same shopping technique...it works really well, and saves ages trying to find stuff in big horrid warehouse spaces...don't forget the dark glasses!
Julie101
26th Jul 2017
4
Thanks for voting!
I would say that I have encountered ageism as in 2012 I was made redundant and it took 18 mths to get another job. I always did well in the interviews and the feed back was usually along the lines of ''top of the list at the moment but we do have a couple more candidates to interview'' and then the sorry you were pipped at the the post rejection letter 🙁 it couldn't be proven of course but both myself and the agency thought it was a possibility. Happily employed now though 🙂
Lionel
26th Jul 2017
3
Thanks for voting!
As Wilf says, not yet!

This hamlet is almost all retirees so a commonality prevails. Oh yes, there is a couple of young families here. They seem to socialise in the neighbouring market towns.

We seldom go to cities - our world is a time capsule. So, yes, we are all but invisible, but that suits us. We had our young days fifty years ago - changed the world! Now it's the turn of today's young folk.

We seldom agree with the direction 21st century life is taking. But, no one wants to hear what we have to say. We made our mistakes and they're already making theirs. Every life mistake costs. Hey Ho!

Did we embraced the second half of our lives? My wife and I are second marrieds; following that there were family deaths, births (not for us) and house moves. 2000 saw Glandular Fever ravage us and we are still living with a recurrences. Now my wife has MS/ME. The root is Glandular Fever. We've now raised two grand children into their teens. What's to embrace? Everything life may hurl at us, that's what! Open arms? No not always.

We are as old as we feel. Yet some days I take my wife's hand and we are back to that time when we first fell in love, many years ago. Age? Does it matter?
Wilf
26th Jul 2017
2
Thanks for voting!
Not yet!...but I suppose there is always time. The world is made for the young with all their energy and enthusiasm..we were all their once!. In bygone days youngsters had more respect for their elders and still do in many countries round the world especially in places like Japan. that all changed here in the 1960s I think with the teenage revolution.Are older people discriminated against? Well a bit I suppose as everyone else is rushing about and hasn't got time for them. My folks are in their late 80s and i am very lucky to have them. I wouldn't say they encounter ageism, just kindness from others helping them.

Community Terms & Conditions

Content standards

These content standards apply to any and all material which you contribute to our site (contributions), and to any interactive services associated with it.

You must comply with the spirit of the following standards as well as the letter. The standards apply to each part of any contribution as well as to its whole.

Contributions must:

be accurate (where they state facts); be genuinely held (where they state opinions); and comply with applicable law in the UK and in any country from which they are posted.

Contributions must not:

contain any material which is defamatory of any person; or contain any material which is obscene, offensive, hateful or inflammatory; or promote sexually explicit material; or promote violence; promote discrimination based on race, sex, religion, nationality, disability, sexual orientation or age; or infringe any copyright, database right or trade mark of any other person; or be likely to deceive any person; or be made in breach of any legal duty owed to a third party, such as a contractual duty or a duty of confidence; or promote any illegal activity; or be threatening, abuse or invade another’s privacy, or cause annoyance, inconvenience or needless anxiety; or be likely to harass, upset, embarrass, alarm or annoy any other person; or be used to impersonate any person, or to misrepresent your identity or affiliation with any person; or give the impression that they emanate from us, if this is not the case; or advocate, promote or assist any unlawful act such as (by way of example only) copyright infringement or computer misuse.

Nurturing a safe environment

Our Silversurfers community is designed to foster friendships, based on trust, honesty, integrity and loyalty and is underpinned by these values.

We don't tolerate swearing, and reserve the right to remove any posts which we feel may offend others... let's keep it friendly!