Did you marry the right person first time round?

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For most people, the day they get married is one of the happiest of their life.

But it seems romance rarely lasts forever, as almost a fifth of people over the age of 50 say their biggest regret in life is marrying the wrong person.

New research into the insecurities of middle-aged people carried out by Silversurfers has revealed that 18% regret tying the knot with their partner.

One in 10 went on to say that “falling in love again” was on their bucket list.

Did you marry the right person first time round?  How long have you been married? Or did you marry the wrong person and have since found new love?

Did you marry the right person first time round?

4853 people have already voted, what's your opinion? YES NO

What are your views on this?

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nanabet48
20th Jun 2015
1
Thanks for voting!
I was engaged to someone when I was 18 but we broke up after 2 years. He always remained 'the one' with a special place in my heart.

I married at 21 but knew I shouldn't have done it. We had a son two years later then split after 9 years after I realised that things were never going to change.

19 years later I bumped into 'the one' but he worked abroad and was going back overseas the following day. We wrote but somehow our letters crossed and we both thought the other didn't want to continue corresponding.

5 years later we bumped into each other again and from that day we have been together - that was 26 years ago. Am I happy - exceedingly!
jeanniet
19th Jun 2015
1
Thanks for voting!
My first marriage ended when he left me for someone else, but looking back we were too young (20) though we didn't think that at the time
DJSwaithe
27th Mar 2015
0
Thanks for voting!
We have just celebrated our Golden Wedding Anniversary in February 2015
bink
14th Feb 2015
0
Thanks for voting!
Met my husband on holiday. Got engaged one year later. Didn't see each other often as I lived in London and he lived in Glasgow! We wrote almost every day.Married 1964. Had one son,a very good marriage. Went on cruises and had a great time. Looking forward to Golden Wedding when he became ill. He died in 2012.
HJR58
26th Jan 2015
2
Thanks for voting!
I was too young and impressionable and paid a high price. My second marriage, now of 25 years has been so different and much happier!
mountainman
11th Jan 2015
4
Thanks for voting!
Never really thought about this as when I was younger I was quite happy to play the field and never bothered about settling down
babblerem
10th Jan 2015
2
Thanks for voting!
I made the mistake of marrying for love. My husband was an educated, charming, popular ex-army officer working as an accountant. When I was 5 months pregnant with our son he left in a car he had not paid for. I did not know where he was and eventually divorced him by newspaper advertisement - desertion and neglect to maintain. I discovered he had left behind debts I knew nothing about and nothing to do with me. Over the years I managed to work and save to buy a home for my son and self. I learned my lesson and decided not to remarry though I received many proposals - even some of marriage!
Alihen
10th Jan 2015
2
Thanks for voting!
Been married for over 40 years and there have been some very miserable moments but who is to say that things would have been any better with someone else? May as well stick with it now.
DJSwaithe
10th Jan 2015
4
Thanks for voting!
As I said earlier it is our 50th Wedding Anniversary on 27 February and we have decided that we do not want to jet off anywhere by ourselves. Our daughters and Grandchildren are part of that 50 years and therefore the only celebration we want is with them so it will be one big happy family meal at our house. Why go away and spend it with strangers?
Sara Hill
10th Jan 2015
3
Thanks for voting!
I married at 19 and was on my own with 2 small children at 22! My first husband left me for an 18 year old but at least they got married and are still together! I remarried and things were OK for a while but we separated after about 15 years. I met my third husband 20 years ago and so far so good!!!

The sad thing is that the boys rarely see their birth father but my husband is considered to be Grandad to all the grandchildren and a very good grandad he is too!
nanny26
10th Jan 2015
3
Thanks for voting!
Feel very happy and blessed to have been married for 52 years. I was only 18 when we married, had our ups and downs of course, but have supported each other through thick and thin.
lizzielady
8th Jan 2015
4
Thanks for voting!
If I had said yes, that would deny my lovely family its existence. Its too simplistic to say you married the wrong person the first time, things go wrong, people change. What I do say is my second husband is definitely the right person for me and I wish I could have had a family with him. However I have a step family now as well as my own and we are both very happy.
Tinks
4th Jan 2015
3
Thanks for voting!
Thought it was love but it wasn't
jinny jane
28th Dec 2014
3
Thanks for voting!
50th Anniversary in July 2015 I was 15 he was 23. We have 2 daughters and 4 grandchildren. I love him to bits good friends as well as lovers, we have had our ups and downs (who does'nt?)) BUt we have always supported each other.
alusru
27th Dec 2014
5
Thanks for voting!
Sadly I stayed married for 37 years to a man I didn't like...stayed for the family and his " position" in society. Now I'm FREE to be me , at last...and a lot happier.
HJR58
26th Jan 2015
0
Thanks for voting!
Good for you! Enjoy your freedom..
DJSwaithe
17th Dec 2014
3
Thanks for voting!
Our Golden Wedding anniversary in February 2015.
Wilf
19th Dec 2014
1
Thanks for voting!
Congratulations thats great news!
P.Pig
17th Dec 2014
2
Thanks for voting!
We were right at the time but grew out of each other!
John 5339
12th Dec 2014
5
Thanks for voting!
l definitely did not marry the right person the first time round,

Although l do not regret it as think it was a path of life and l have a wonderful son from it.
margie
8th Dec 2014
6
Thanks for voting!
married my first husband when i was 19yrs old and he was 21yrs old
i thought he was the best thing since slice bread..
after first son was born for some reason he turned violent..
not a good thing so with much thought and another son we got divorced..
having worked hard to bring up my sons as a one parent family.
many years later sixteen to be exact i met and married a loving and caring man who is the apple of my eye.
been married now for 22yrs and it has been the best years of my life..
my sons think of him with respect and at last second time around i got it right
daydreams
6th Dec 2014
3
Thanks for voting!
I married the right person first, and second time, around. My first husband collapsed and died suddenly when we had only been married a few years, leaving me a widow at 25 with two small children.
I've now been happily married to my second soul mate for almost forty years, we have grown closer as we have grown older together.
superbius
4th Dec 2014
2
Thanks for voting!
Met my first wife in the Army, she was also in it. We became friends and lovers in a short time, all to short as it turned out.
I went to Kenya for 3 years and didn't want to be on my own so we got married. Then incompatibility set in and from there it was all downhill. My current wife is the light of my life and we have been together for 38 years so far. AB FAB.
John Hall
3rd Dec 2014
3
Thanks for voting!
married my wife in 1970 divorced in 1984 got back together in 1986 remarried in 1990 still together love her and our 13 grandkids as much as I ever did.
grandad454
1st Dec 2014
3
Thanks for voting!
...met when we were 16, and she was 17.. In 1970.. I joined the Royal Air Force and got to travel around a bit and loved it. We married in 1972 when I was 18 and she was 19.. that was the mistake, we weren't in love, we were in love with the idea of being in love.. We had to live apart until I could get some married quarters sorted, and then when I did she joined me. We later found out that we expecting a child and we were over the moon, I was particularly pleased as she was home sick and I thought that the child would help settle her down.. Our baby daughter was born in the February of 1973 and she was beautiful, I thought that this would be the perfect solution to her being home sick.. That was the start of the problems.. her parents had to come down to see their Grandchild (They couldn't wait until I got some leave and visited them), A fortnight later, as they were preparing to go, the mother-in-law suggested that mother and child go back to the North-east with them for a (Break) as I was going on detachment soon anyway.. from then on, it was all down hill, she spent more time with her parents than she did with me, her excuse always being that I was always going away..! I reminded her that that's what happens in the armed force's and that I had no control over it. In the end I gave up the married quarters and moved back into barracks.. when I eventually left the RAF, we ended up living with her interfering parents again for about a year, we did eventually get our own house, but by then the rot had set in, my wife wasn't running the home, her mother was.. after a while, I couldn't take it any more, I gave her the option to move away with me to another part of the country where I had landed a fantastic job with a good salary. She refused, saying that she wouldn't be able to settle, and her mother was complaining that she wouldn't see her or the grandchildren and that I was been selfish..?.. so, I stayed there, got made redundant, was unemployed for about four years, and we had drifted apart because of the constant arguments about work and money. She would nag at me about getting a job, and I would reply to her that 'I had one, but you wouldn't leave your mother's apron strings'. In the end the fighting got too bad and we divorced... I've since remarried, and, I honestly wish that, had it not been for the children, that I'd met my present wife first. I've never been so happy and contented, and although we are both now in ill health, we still look after each other and do anything we can for each other..
lizzielady
8th Jan 2015
3
Thanks for voting!
I am so glad you found happiness in the end Grandad.
thefoz
1st Dec 2014
5
Thanks for voting!
Met at work 37 years ago and married 3 months later. My colleagues tutted and said it could never last.
There have been times when I could have cheerfully murdered him but then I look at some of my friends husbands and realise what a treasure I have so I think I'll stick with him as long as I can.
plowther
30th Nov 2014
3
Thanks for voting!
I was married for 20years before I realised I had married the wrong man.Had 3 lovely girls, now have 2 granchildren, so no regrets about that!! Really envious but happy for all those who made the right decision from the start! Still live in hope!!
jualsagi
26th Nov 2014
5
Thanks for voting!
I married after 6 weeks 'courtship' in 1972, I was just 21 & he was just 22. We didn't tell our families until after the event! We were married30 years & had 6 children whom we both love. We did our best to pull together but after the children grew up we split up... I left as I couldn't face spending the rest of my life with someone who I had nothing in common with. It was a good decision for both of us, & we are both happy again, him remarried to someone compatible & me happily unmarried & very busy with all sorts of things!
Wilf
26th Nov 2014
6
Thanks for voting!
I think I did. Been married for 45 years. Been through the rough and the smooth and been some very happy times. Too easy to divorce nowadays, you need to work at a marrage.
Mike Brightman
26th Nov 2014
7
Thanks for voting!
40th Anniversary in July 2014 and Ruthy still puts up with me. Yes it has had its ups and downs - and we had to work on living together. But from the moment we met we never stopped talking - and we both have many interests in common. It is not all fun and frolics (!) - but it is worth it. Something about when the going gets tough the tough get going - as long as it's not straight out the door and never to return! Good luck to all newlyweds. I got very lucky indeed! (Michael Brightman The Mystery Factor ebook)
Dandylads
26th Nov 2014
6
Thanks for voting!
My first was all I had hoped for however I soon found out that he was up to no good and was a prolific cheater. Fast forward 10 years or more and my knight in shining armour turned up and we have had the best nearly 17 years of our lives. I am a firm believer that there is someone for everyone out there
maureen14
26th Nov 2014
7
Thanks for voting!
I was happily married for 10 years had 2 lovely children then he decided to trade me in for a girl half his age needless to say they soon split up then I met and married a lovely guy had two more children.we have been together for over 30yrs and are very happy
V J C
26th Nov 2014
9
Thanks for voting!
I met my husband when I was 14 and he was 15 in 1962. We married when I was 16 and he was 17. We had a very hard time at the beginning but have just celebrated our Golden Wedding Anniversary and I love him more than ever. We are still the best of friends as well as husband and wife. I just can't imagine life without him, he is like my right arm.
plowther
30th Nov 2014
3
Thanks for voting!
So envious, good luck to you both! xx
jualsagi
27th Nov 2014
4
Thanks for voting!
Very lucky lady :-))
Northenstar
26th Nov 2014
8
Thanks for voting!
I married the most fantastic woman. When I was 20. And she was 19. We had two children. and we were so happy. Then my world collapsed. After 15 years of happy marriage. She was taken form me. Cancer had killed her. Its been almost 30 years since that day. But my love and longing for her. Has never died.
taffey
9th Dec 2014
2
Thanks for voting!
How lucky were you. experiencing a happy marriage, treasure the memerioes , i was married for 26years to a man who was so cold and self centred but i stuck in there hoping that one day he would show me true love, which never happened. now divorced
plowther
30th Nov 2014
3
Thanks for voting!
So sad, better to have loved than not at all! I'm sure she's with you in spirit! x
marys
26th Nov 2014
6
Thanks for voting!
Yes I did,caring ,sharing and lots of patience,:)
Herbert
25th Nov 2014
9
Thanks for voting!
Yes I definitely married the right lady. Still very happily married! The secret? I do as I am told!
9
Thanks for voting!
Happy to say I married the right man first time round! We've been married for nearly 30 years; I was a child bride! We also work together too ... No one else could put up with him! 😉

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