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Hi just joined and like many of you, recently widowed, last year, no kids or furry friends. Could have retired but decided to stay on in my post within the NHS.


Since my husband died. I feel I have been living my life on the back of everyone else's. I would like a life of my own with my own friends and interests, which was why I joined this site.


Look forward to chatting to like minded people but need help as to how this could work


Created By on 21/08/2019

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AnneS101
28th Dec 2019 19:09:54
0
Thanks for voting!
Hello everyone. I am not widowed but divorced 5 years ago after 32 years of marriage. I have grieved over the loss of my marriage, and some days still do, but I don't live in the past because I know I cannot change it. My ex lives locally and I see him often as he brings our dog to visit me. He drops her off and then picks her up after a few hours. I lost friends who decided they would rather be friends with my ex, but that is their choice. This change in my life affected me greatly and it is only now I am really moving forward. This year, in July, after six months of illness I lost my sister to cancer. It has been a weird Christmas without her, but on of my sons, his fiancee and one of my grandsons and his girlfriend and her daughter came to spend time with me over Christmas, and I really appreciated that. Since they left yesterday I have been exhausted but content. Being single again at my age is not what I envisioned and I find it even more difficult because of not being able to go out due to my physical disability. If you have read this far, please don't think I am complaining because I am not. I have learned to be content in any situation and deep down inside I am happy although I experience days of sadness. I have decided as we approach the end of this year to start the New Year with a new mindset. I am getting rid of all the rubbish in my mind and giving myself the freedom to just be me - not someone's ex-wife. Life is far too short to waste it over things I cannot change. I hope you all managed to get through Christmas and that you start the New Year with a positive outlook, as I intend to do. Best wishes to you all. I will return in the near future and will hopefully be more active in the forum. Many blessings to you all.
PatriciaB96
26th Dec 2019 11:41:23
0
Thanks for voting!
Good morning I like to wish everyone a happy Christmas and New year , to all new members to the site , this is the time of year when we all need a friend to chat to , let's hope we make one .
ecarg
26th Dec 2019 10:05:03
0
Thanks for voting!
I understand what you mean about living life on the back of everyone else's.
In my case it's being too accommodating to my children and not saying no often enough.
Happy to chat further on this topic in a private chat.
FrancesB1
10th Nov 2019 12:21:14 (Last activity: 23rd Dec 2019 23:43:06)
0
Thanks for voting!
There seems to be a lot of people once widowed suddenly realise they haven’t got their own social life.
I’m the same very recently widowed after 47 years married. It never bothered me before as I’d always worked, enjoyed my social life and was very independent.
Unfortunately, I stopped work due to severe arthritis back in 2007. I’ve been very happy but suppose I lived through family and did more and more as a couple. With losing him this August it hit me that yes I can cope but where do you begin to regain some sort of social life? I feel very guilty asking family to keep me company but am lucky they care. People you knew as a couple do keep there distance whether because they don’t know what to say or whatever. How are you all doing out there?
Response from ElaineofKalilily made on 23rd Dec 2019 23:43:06
Yes, it's hard to start over as a single person. Sometimes Senior Centers are a good place to start, and they often have sessions on grieving (any kind of loss). I moved to another state and moved in with my daughter and family. It's been ten years and I really have only made one good friend. I thought maybe getting into a forum or group chat might help.
ElaineofKalilily
23rd Dec 2019 23:39:37
0
Thanks for voting!
I think that a place to start is to leave a response to someone's post. Or go to the forum and find a topic that you might like to post about. I imagine it takes time to make contacts. But if you respond to the posts of others, it can get the ball rolling. You can check their profiles and see if they are someone you would find interesting.
AnneS101
9th Nov 2019 11:28:06
0
Thanks for voting!
Hello Christineloy101, I hope you find new friends here. What are your interests? Some of us are card makers or write poetry. Have a good day today, regardless of your circumstances and enjoy this site.
GillianW34
8th Nov 2019 20:41:36
1
Thanks for voting!
Feel the same. Have lost my husband very recently and whilst I miss him dreadfully feel that new friends and interests could be beneficial. Life is too short to waste!
ecarg
24th Aug 2019 08:05:16
0
Thanks for voting!
Hi Christineloy101
I sent you a private chat a few days ago.
Click on the arrow on the right of the screen it will bring up your chats.
You may find others have been in touch too.
AnneS101
22nd Aug 2019 22:10:47
0
Thanks for voting!
Hello Christineloy101 I am new here too. I hope to learn the ropes and be able to take part in the forum - once I figure it out lol
PatriciaB96
22nd Aug 2019 21:12:07
0
Thanks for voting!
Good evening christineloy101 , welcome to this site , I hope younwill make lots of new friends with the same interest as you .
John7453
22nd Aug 2019 10:54:20
0
Thanks for voting!
Hi Christine and welcome to the site, I hope that you find plenty of people to chat with on here, John

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