Moving home alone
Watch this postHello, I'm not sure what to do! I was in West Yorkshire for 44 years and moved to a small town on the Northumberland coast 6 years ago. I used to have a caravan up here for holidays and it seemed like the right thing to do at the time. Not to grow old in a big city. Now I miss the buzz and mix of different people in the city. I used to enjoy singing in big choirs and enjoyed the free organ recitals and Town hall concerts and brass bands. I really miss the potential company of like minded people.
It is very insular here and all attempts at joining things or volunteering have failed, partly due to health issues of anxiety and depression. I have no family near. My daughter and son are both 3 hour journeys away in opposite directions. I like driving and have a good car and golden retriever Ted who is my trusty friend. The advantages are the large beaches so as I need a lot of my own space it's good. The climate is cold and I miss wearing summer clothes. I'm always in winter clothes here.
The move here was exhausting on my own and it was hard in early December. No one seemed to have time to befriend me, with one exception, a good lady from a local church. However I do value the fact that I can say hello to people around the town, at least after a while at least your face gets known! I miss woods and trees and parks and shelter. When the wind is strong and cold people don't tarry so there is little chance to chat on a dog walk.
In Leeds dog walking was much more a social part of my life. Here it is solitary and I have become solitary and lost confidence socially. Maybe just that I don't feel there are people I want to befriend. There are a lot of married couples who've retired here and they socialise in couples. I'd love to be able to volunteer some way in the world of woodland, birds, animal rescue, to be usefully occupied with like minded people and milder weather.
I don't have a lot of money as I spent a lot on moving here and down sized. My house has not increased in value, so when I look at houses in Leeds I could only afford to live in rough areas. So I do nothing and fear I'm wasting my life just treading water.
No one to discuss these things with. So thanks for reading this. I love canals and miss towpaths though at present I value the wide open space on the beaches and in many ways the pandemic has had little effect on my social isolation!
I would value any objective views. I am a fit [I think] 71 year old divorced woman.
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Since my divorce, I have been unmarried too. But, I'm not complaining, I am happy to be alone from time to time. Stay around; It is true that the pandemic is still ongoing, and when it is finally finished, you may visit your kids and have a great vacation. Anyway, people here are always happy to chat.
Like you I love the beaches in summer, my sister lives on the Lincs coast, I used to have a caravan nearby, but my kids got fed up and so we went camping further south and had holidays abroad and we did the 'Sun' holidays and have travelled to Scotland and down to Kent and Cornwall we have stayed at most of the Haven and Park Dean sites. I have lived here all my life and been single 37 years since my divorce but . My advice would be to stay put, we are not through the pandemic and when it is eventually all over, you can visit your children and have some nice holidays, the Yorkshire Dales are lovely and you could join some walking groups. Look for singles groups on facebook the over 50's and 60's and there is a camping group for 'singles'. You will soon make friends and possibly stay with them, but there are some great hostels for singles, I stayed in a lovely one in Inverness and you can take your dog. I have two 5 year old chihuahuas.